Living your Best Life: Singles Edition & Practical tips

Single and living my best life?! Yessss I am huntyyyyy!

I am single and truly living my best-est life with my God the Father! 

In this world all of us, whether we’ve stopped for a moment to realise it or not, we are searching for a deep inner peace that stays. A place where conviction doesn’t  exist, a place where worries and stresses of this world, that although may be present, do not affect us and we simply wake up joyful. This is the type of joy that living my life for God and currently being single has truly allowed me to find and live my best life. This is a deep happiness of joy from within that comes from the covering of God to block out the distractions and noise that I’m all too familiar with ie boys that seize my attention, when God has asked me as a virgin to focus on him (1 Corinthians 7: 34-35) so he can do the things in my life that He knows how to do best, in order for me to become that virtuous woman of God I know I was created to be. He has gifted me with this covering through my embracing of my singleness to focus on him before it comes time to focus on my husband (1 Corinthians 7: 34-35) because when he arrives, He above would have made me in to his wife. The glory will be all His as the wife I become will be because of these types of single seasons and the lessons God has taught me which has deepened my understanding of what it means to have a healthy relationship, maintain one and He has blessed me with the revelation of these  in actual form through our relationship – how amazing is God that He does that all in one move! Que the chariot called marriage! 

If you haven’t checked out the corresponding video which shares my #NoBoysAllowed Update, go watch it now – But for the most part of 4 years, approaching 5 years, I have been single, no commitments! I was seeing people before and was in a “relationship” last year, and I say it with quotations because when someone pulls you away from God and are deceitful about their character and therefore isn’t the person who they say they are, then the question of whether a relationship really existed with that person is a legit one as no relationship should entertain both of those things as they are not present in your relationship with God our father and we look to imitate that as when we get married we take our eyes of that relationships and transfer it to our husbands. Deceit and pushing you further away from God are two MASSIVE red flags a person shouldn’t ignore as they are weapons of the devil to derail you, and are not the fruitfulness of God! Take heed and flee! 

That is another story for another time, but God really mainly used that relationship to begin my celibacy journey with the right frame of mind and to truly make it count and not to do it “just because the bible says so”. God used it to teach me two things mainly that are crucial in life in general once your really grasps the conepts and use it for your advantage:

1) When given grace, the joy and blessings that come from God when you honour him and don’t do anything that goes against is honestly beyond your wildest of dreams

2) The key of Obedience opens many doors that grace can walkthrough, especially when it comes time to honour him.


So right now I am indeed as single as they can get. Now millienials like to put a new spin on everything, so when I mean single, I mean single! No person i’m ‘kinda’ talking to, no old fame to I wish to rekindle tucked away, no entertaining of ‘hey bighead’ texts – literally no one but God occupys this space and I am as happy as I could ever be to the point that at times (more times than I care to admit lol) I completely shy away from the idea of marriage. I shy away because although I desire the next stage of my life, I know something will have to give when it comes time to get married either my my husband or God and God has been very clear about who I should face when that decison comes about because He has joined us together in marriage for a new purpose in our lives that we need to complete together as help-meets and I will need to pour in to that relationship to get back to God in the way I am familiar with now. So I will miss this vast amount of time I spend with God (enormously) as relationships are consuming of your time, energy and emotions that I just soley at this moment want to pour in to my current relationship with God to establish myself for the ministry I am called currently whilst I am single on my own so God can trust me before I become a wife and become a ministry together with my husband with the little before he gives me the large (Luke 16:10). So I am lonesome in this physical journey and have been abstinent to no kissing, touching, NADA for about a year. A true year of no boys allowed nd and boy did that year fly by so fast when you do not focus on it and you’re just simply having fun with God every single day that your look forward to the next day, then the next and then BOOM it’s another year!! This time has only been possible becuase of God as he was the carrying me through each day spiritually and physically and giving me strength in both these areas at the differnet points in the year that I needed it- which has been more than sufficient even when I didn’t know it.

Of course everyones journey to marriage and through singleness is differnt but one thing stands true in all our stories and is that God really uses this sinlge time and fellowship with Him to transform you permanently in a way unimaginable and will forever be priceless to you. It is time you will never get back once you move in to the new chapter of marriage so see it as a blessing and use it well (James 1: 2-4)


12 Practical Tips

The tips below are in afdition to my video, but these are my tips to keep the reassurance of God and His truths in my heart and that I use to combat the devil when he tries to kill steal and destroy my peace about being celibate and single in this time and is what this post and my YouTube video centres on – These are the practical tips that we can apply to not just only our celibacy journey, but other journies that we are going through in our Christian walk – I pray God translates this to any area of your life that it is needed in Jesus name, Amen:

  1. First and foremost: KEEP DILIGENT ABOUT GOD’S BUSINESS! You bored? Read the bible? You bored? Watch YouTube sermons. You anxious, pray. You’re doubting or your faith is weary, stir your spirit with faith that can move a mountain. Once you carry His heart, God’s worries of this world and woes will be downloaded in to your heart and will occupy your time as He begins to step in and let him shape you for your purpose. The devil makes work for idle hands. You worried about a specific part of your walk, find guidance from his word or people who know it.
  2. Leading me on to the need to Fellowship/grow relationships with Godly counsel. In plain and simple terms – make your core friends God’s people who edify and encourage you based on the word not their ‘opinion’ as a lot of people in this world have opinions, that does not mean it is facts – facts is the bible. I am going to unpack this one a little more than the others as this one is so cruicial especially as milenials who like to enjoy this life with our friends, not knowing they are the ones holding you back. It is so important what you feed your mind and walk with as that food will start to digest when you are alone with your thoughts and will dictate heavily (subconciously and consicously) how easy or how hard your walk is. Side note: If your friends are having sex around you AND THIS IS YOUR BIGGEST AREA OF WEAKNESS – RUN FOREST RUN!! SO GOD CAN BE YOUR HELPER (AMOS 5: 14-15)!! It comes up in the bible a lot about the importance of counsel (Proverbs 11: 14)  Surrounding yourself with the right people is extremely important as we are set apart (salt), we are different and part of a kingdom that is not of this world meaning the encouragement and standards that get set need to come from our kingdom not this world. Of course in life this applies across the board, but more so at the early stages of your stand and walk with Christ as you can’t be surrounded with people who are lukewarm as you will dilute yourself, you need to be around people who are on fire for God and stepping out of your comfort zone and meeting new church friends is a great place as any to start if you don’t think you can do this walk physcially alone. This is so important as what you feed yourself is what you will be, ‘show me your friends and i will tell you who you are’, if you have friends who are still walking in sin, iron sharpens iron (Proverbs 27: 17) and as you both are “weak” you will be sharpening eachother with your limitations of your weakness and devious lustful thoughts. But when you are accountable to people who are on fire for God (not perfect, on fire – massive difference) they will combat the straying thoughts and flesh desires with the truth and spirit of God and replace the lies an temptations of the devil and our flesh as we walk in spirit not flesh (2 Corinthians 10:3-5) The bible speaks about in the multitude of counsellors there is safety (Proverbs 15:22) – cannot stress this enough!! Safety from doors and cracks in windows opening to let the devil come in to your life, thoughts and actions through things such as seeds of doubt being planted by your friends or after hearing about your friends doing the ‘deed’ etc when you need to keep focused on point one – keep diligent about God’s business. If you don’t have Christians friends that you can confide in like that, pray for God to give them to you and whilst you wait (because alothough God can do it overnight, it may not happen that way) start to cut off the people laying bad seeds and surround yourself with friends/family who respect you, your walk, change of mind and your new boundaries. Once you start doing that and signalling to heaven you are faithful with the little (Luke 16: 10), and start demonstrating you are happy to stand for him and make way for the new, he will devlier exceedingly and abundantly. Trust me God will replace them with better friends if need be as it benefits Him as He will have more productivity in building His kingdom as you’re working together. Be around friends that whilst you’re weak in your flesh to sexual desire (or any sin) you will have friends who will not have conversations about these things with you or around you and who encourage you in the wrong way even by their actions and inability to step away from sin themselves when they know better, as you can easily start to compare yourself to someone’s lack of strength and say ‘oh I can’t do it just like so and so’ or say subliminally ‘if so and so can’t do it, I surely can’t’ and then fall and abuse grace yet you know better – NO! God has another calling for you remember that. Standing for God will never leave you without or lacking for anything that God won’t restore when the time is right, with double fold! 
  3. Remember “I am his bridegroom so I am never ever alone” – That’s one thing we forget as christians and especially during this walk, keep that sentence repeated on your lips! Keep thanks in your heart and fix your jewels girl (Isaiah 61:10)
  4. Remember ‘I am truly free!‘ From people bondage, from wasted investments, failed relationships and free from walking through gates like rejection for it to be used by the devil to enter my heart. You are free from the envy of others getting married and seemingly finding their soulmate because you know yours is coming! (Galatians 5: 1)
  5. Leads me on to the benefits which will be evident in the long run of obedience being practiced in this short and temporary season, which is crucial to make you perfect through your tests (James 1: 2-4). 
  6. This obedience and new understanding of it destroy your fleshly lustful desires and celibacy now becomes less of an issue till. God created boundaries to not ‘awaken love before the right time (Songs of Solomon 8: 4) trust him with the unknown.
  7. God intends for seasons just as these to be silent so you can hear and be tested. We know after we pass a test we can move on to a greater level and it’s the same, must revise/must practice obedience and surrender and then we move up to this we can responsibly handle. (Luke 16:10)
  8. Me and God are co-d’s! I have built up such a bond and relationship with God that I actually fear getting in to marriage as I know I will have to get naked and vulnerable all over again like I have had to do with God, but now to someone physcial who can actually talk back straight away?! eeshh lol
  9. I get to know myself all over again, but through the manufactures guide – I get to break the mould of this world and allow the true potter to reform me inline with who I was always suppose to be. I get to know myself through God’s eyes, the one who made me who knew the plans for me before I was even formed. Who better than the creator of a iPhone to tell you how a iPhone works? 
  10. I get to now love me even more in a new and different way because I now can understand my value in God, not just what I may bring to the table physically and being to the table from the perspective of the world. I am an investment as I am a royalty, I am a royal priesthood of a kingdom, do you know who my father is? He loved me first to create me, I am 
  11. My mind has been unboxed and transformed. I believe in the impossible, do you know what that feels like? Not to even doubt it?
  12. Realised how and what I have been called to do which is different from having the revelation of your purpose. God gives it to you in stages and this single stage is when God gave me my next.


Testimony Time

See once you really get to know God, just as with your relationship with your best friend, you truly begin to carry his heart burdens and desires, if God is grieved, you are grieved. You really begin to want to meet him one day and when that day comes you just want to run to him and sit as a child at their parent’s feet and share what they’ve done with their day or life and them be just as happy and proud of you, as you are of yourself and your accomplishments. To do that we have to remain blameless and I am on a constant joureny of ensuring I have the correct heart posture (examine yourself scripture) to serve him in everything, even in my single life. 

God told me when I was 21 sitting in my uni church lecture hall boo’d up what My purpose was but I wasn’t ready or convinced he could be talking about little old me! I’m now going on 25 now and have accepted, walked in to and am being prepared for that very calling and I am single. God cleared the room to make the space. Only now has God revealed the purpose of the ministry and what I am called to do and my single season is cultivating and qualifying me to complete and fulfil my ministry properly unapologetically where I die with nothing left to be said (2Tim 4:1-7). To preach the word and make the diluted and misunderstood truth about who Jesus is correct in our hearts and minds on how to be christians in the 21st century using Biblical principles. 

Testimony: I have been single for the most part of I’d say about 4 and a half years where God has been transforming me in unimagienable ways as I became more and more of a living sacrifice in different areas of my life at different stages. God really started to strip back, break down and remove forcefully majority of my long term friendships. So I’m not out here in these streets with my worldly friends living my best life, I am out here living my best life because I am praising and giving God the praise and honour due for the peace, joy and love he pours in to me in this time. 

Being truly single, and being completely  dis-attached from men/women, sin, sinners, by creating boundaries during this time that build your foundation of the manifestation of your purpose in life is absolutely crucial during this time. 

1 Corinthians 7 states what our heart right posture and position should be whilst we wait for God’s very best which is to focus on him till the time your husband becomes your husband or your wife becomes your wife. That means no distractions should fill that time waiting, no bad relationships should be entertained or cultivated, no living in sin – but letting God prepare all that is necessary in you and your spouse during this time because you are in a place of purity, obedience and diligence towards God’s business to reap and benefit from the harvest of your single season/sewing season. 

This generation of milenials are so disillusioned because we want to be part of a culture that is destroying our souls and heart towards God (Galatians 4:16) and we want to be in the know, yet not learn what it truly means it is to be and live in a relationship with Christ? We compromise and don’t even know it and want to be single and mix, singing the latest music which glorifies the Devil, but because they’re just words and I claim and accept Jesus that’s okay? Wrong. We are responsible for what we let in our minds and hearts because sin has a tendency not come and present itself in big old letters saying SIN for us to identify it, it come in little and discreet ways and penetrates the heart before you’ve even realised it’s in there, and now you’re making excuses for it. Break free! 

 It was difficult being the first of many around me immediately and distantly (cause you know Instagram/social media extends your social circle) to stand for Christ the way I do because I learnt very quickly not everyone is willing to grow with you and not everyone can come along, so I have had to do this alone for the most part of which I am extremely grateful for as I have no time to waste as this life is limited to get me to eternity which is what I focus on. As I am young, the world tells me I should be living my best life in what this world deems it is at this age of doing the upmost of worldly things having meaningless and self-appeasing relationships and breaking new boundaries with no one to reign me in and tell me no as everyone is just as wild, young and free so they can’t speak out and be hypocrites! 

No, God has raised a standard in me that I am unwilling to shake and unwilling to put aside to appease this world and the people in it. If that means God needs to continue to place me in an isolation period to raise a generation of people who understand relationships better because of the one I have with Him, then so be it! If God has to continue to cloak me till the time is right for my Adam to find me then so be it! If God has to continue to remove friends/relationship that do not fellowship or reverence him as wise counsel should then let them go and so be it! 

I am standing my ground, just as the devil stands his and this battle is God’s to be victorious in because I have yielded myself to him to use me as he wishes so the glory is his too. When I was a baby Christian that lacked understanding, it was very hard to surrender my single-ness to God because I had ideas of what my husband was gonna be and look like, friends that were gonna be in my life forever and at points even used His word to get to that conclusion! But I had to get vulnerable and naked in front of him to work in me and realise I cannot choose myself I will choose wrong and I am not in control of this if I know that! To allow God to allow that truth to set in my heart and accept whoever he brings and what we he looks like physically. I had to break this mindset down and say I am not choosing God and that God should prepare him and I separately and present us to one another like Esther. I had to get face down at his altar and let him rip apart the ideas of relationships this world has formed and how I think I can choose using my own eyes and flesh and had to usher Him in to choose for me and I be in a place where I accept! 

I know God’s best for me will be my very best as marriage means I am moving in to another mission that this earlier part of my life was preparing me for and I cannot wait as I am single and living my best life with the God who can do anything! Isn’t that amazing? 

I have grown deeper in my faith in so many unexpected ways such as even exploring the true meaning of music and its purpose to worship. I am on a journey where now I’m listening to gospel music 90% of my time going from someone who didn’t know a Christian artist accept for Kirk franklin and Mary Mary etc and I expect God to continue to increase that % as he prepares me for what is to come!!! I encourage you to walk in this way ladies and gents as I promise you, you will never regret it or look back.

I will do a video or blog on different branches of this single walk such as not settling and God preparing and presenting you using a bible studies which will be part of the #NoBoysAllowed series and I’m excited for but in God’s very timing, as always. 

Remember: ‘You have the right to do anything’- you say, but not everything is beneficial (1 Corinthians 6:12)

Till next time. M.E



Scriptures in order of appearance:

  • 1 Corinthians 7: 34-35
  • Luke 16:10
  • Proverbs 11: 14
  • Amos 5: 14-15
  • Proverbs 27: 17
  • 2 Corinthians 10:3-5
  • Proverbs 15:22
  • Isaiah 61:10
  • Galatians 5: 1
  • James 1: 2-4
  • Songs of Solomon 8: 4
  • Galatians 4:16
  • 1 Corinthians 6:12

People & Relationships: Forgiveness (Pt 1)

The older I get, the smaller my circle gets. Common truth of many but most definitely is the realest of truths and so it should be. Also more obviously, once you get married you have one egg in your one basket for the rest of your life. Why? Well I wish to explore just that. The marriage analogy is somewhat more widely understood (yet at the same time so misunderstood, different time different place), however the friendship one is something that I believe we as a generation who focus on marriage a lot forget the importance of everything else that contributes heavily to your relationship with God and the building of his kingdom  – this is all your relations with all types of people. I begin with the understanding that both have a lot, if not everything, to do with increasing your the ability to focus more intensely on what God’s will is over your life ultimately and more specifically to help you clear the room out of noise and distractions to focus on the day-to-day situations he places you in order to achieve it as he calls us to focus on today as tomorrow has its own worries (Matthew 6: 34). God will call for a a heightened increase at times in your life of your faith and commitment to be transformed for his call over your life through means of your marriage, friendships, jobs etc and if your focus is tunnel vision on God in these relationships he has given, the people He uses will begin to teach us heavenly lessons and begin stretching our character to shape us to achieve His will. The commitment to focus on God (via the passage of the relationships we stick out) and our investment investment in these relationships will ensure the fruit of the relationships are good and in turn builds his kingdom by continually by the character he creates who revealing who Christ is, even in difficult circumstances where we may find it hard to forgive.

Two fundamental facts I do know that helps me focus is 1) Everything has its own time and its own season and 2) as humans, and more so when you accept Christ and become a living sacrifice, we are God’s property to be used to his will – as and when He wishes and the hard truth many people fail to understand or reject is that it can be for our benefit or not at all for our benefit but for your neighbours. God uses real people and relationships to do his work husbands, wives, friends, family, work colleagues, fellow car drivers, ordinary public transport commuters to do His physical work to mould you. He firstly uses people to create a self awareness and show you things about yourself you can’t see. Your strengths and weakness’ in your character even hard hidden hearts hence why relationships and interactions with people bring out the best and the absolute worst in you. God intentionally charges Rebecca, Larry, Kemi and Folu and that ‘wicked’ manager at work with missions that are directly related to your destiny to build your character and we need to think of whether we are being attentive enough to do something with this information and endure the uncomfortable situation God is asking you to be still in. Whether the people God uses know their mission or not, HE is intentional with who He allows to be in your life even when you choose correctly and incorrectly, He turns it around because we know the plans he has for us are good (Jeremiah 29: 11). We need to be more naked in these intentional long term relationships (marriage/friendships/family) to achieve the ultimate plan over our lives hence why circles get smaller. You can’t open your heart and be naked in front of everyone as we are called to guard our hearts (Proverbs 4: 23) as the issues of life flow from there. Giving everyone or anyone the access to your nakedness empowers the enemy to use it against you and exposes you to a hard heart which harbours unforgiveness amongst other wounds that need to be healed for those who never should have been there.

Jesus at key moments in the Bible, such as the mount of transfiguration (Luke 9: 28- 36) only kept James, Peter and John around him although he had 12 disciples – not everyone is going where you’re going, many are called few are chosen (Matthew 22: 14) and knowing this gives you the power to prevent rather than cure. If Judas who Jesus still loved and kept as a friend was let in to the fold of his heart like Peter, James and John can you imagine the deep cut of that betrayal Jesus would have felt? Cover up your heart and start discerning why and who is your circle. Let God choose your husband or wife. Nakedness in our relationships is such a powerful weapon against the enemy so we are not being used or distracted to seal our own fate. It allows us to show us ourselves for who we are to help God help you to see the flaws in ourselves voluntarily (so it is more effective) to yield yourself to him so He can fix it and fill the holes this life creates in your heart and mind and make you whole again but in Him who stands still (Malachi 6: 1), is faithful and can never fail you. He uses people to challenge us and can create awkward, irritating and tense environments for you to grow and build your character in Him by being obedient to what he has called for you to do when facing testing or hurtful situations in marriages and friendships. Lean on him because you have him, surrender to Him to use of the relationships you have to feel the stretching of his call on your life. So naturally be expectant of movement, be expectant of change, be expectant of growth through people as that’s where God does his best work and we must stay still to see it out and love people ultimately and turn for them to slap the right cheek after they’ve slapped the left all to serve. Be diligent and focused on how to deliver on God’s desire when he orchestrates the relationships he brings us to and allows us to enjoy as a by-product of his will over your life. We are imperfect, frail and human, in other words we will fail and we should have our expectations in God but when we fail at this sometimes we find it hard to forgive and this is crippling.

After understanding the uses of people in our lives, we need to remember that the flesh and spirit, heaven and hell, you and the enemy are always at constant war (Romans 8) there are ways to strike down the weapons formed against you (to act, speak and think Christ-like) but the final weapon we can use in a battle we walk in flesh, but do not fight with our flesh (2 Corinthians 10: 3-4 ) is to use forgiveness. This is can be the final decider when the flesh seems to be winning. If we do not understand it’s true power it becomes either non-existent (you are unforgiving) or the sword is blunt (lack of understanding thinking its about the other person) and does no damage to cast down the plans of the devil for your destruction. It is a common and frequent disguised tool the devil uses to derail you from focusing on who God is creating you to be through the relationships and people around you is your lack of understanding of what it means to forgive, who and what its for and then to actually forgive. This is a two-step process that when we are being led by our flesh and are headstrong and proud, it is very difficult if not impossible to draw on the humility you need to use this weapon effectively. We as kingdom seekers look long term and forgiveness is a long term goal orientated weapon as you can change the past, what someone has done or hasn’t done to you but with forgiveness you have the power to change your future irrespective of today or yesterday. – we do no set our eyes on man’s eternity which is simply a life of 80+ of we are lucky, we set our eyes on God’s eternity which forgiveness gives access.

If you hold on to things that God is asking you to move on from, you’re stressing yourself out unnecessarily and will get stuck in a place of disobedience where nothing is fruitful there. God’s voice becomes so unfamiliar as you continue to ignore instructions and then the final one of forgive regarding a situation that once before God’s voice was so clear on. Also on the flip-side if you let go too soon because you can’t take the heat then you miss the lesson or don’t gain what you need to move you to the next season so God will repeat the same lesson again and again and give us the same opportunity to pass this test – the only thing that will be different is the details. He won’t move you to the next stage until you pull out what he is asking you to pull down from heaven. We get it stuck in our tiny little human minds in comparisons to Gods, that we just simply can’t forgive! No, no way, I can’t! He did that and I’m supposed to just go on and just forgive him?! She said and then did this and I’M SUPPOSED TO FORGIVE?!?! The simple answer is yes and for just one simple reason, you are able to live because God loved you first and forgives every secret, public, private, despicable, unholy, disrespectful, immoral, degrading, humiliating thing you do when you are unsaved and even when you tell the world you know him and do these things which embarrasses him and allows the devil to use things like that to his advantage – HE STILL FORGIVES YOU. In other words he gives you grace. How much grace are you showing others when this is the level God is gracing you with? If we are unforgiving of others because we don’t understand the level and depth of forgiveness God has for us, let me just quickly clear this up and clarify it for you – He forgives you for any and everything. Period point blank. No if’s. No buts. No maybes. So if God can who the hell are we and why can’t we when we are makers and creators of nothing!!


I know as humans when we have sinned against God especially when the spirit is weak and we ignore our convictions or the explicit word we are overcome with a sense of shame and guilt that we just wanna run away from God and hide from his sight to cover up the dirt from his magnificent eyes, but baby-love he sees all of it. There is no where to hide so what you gonna do about it? continue to live in sin or ask for a forgiveness that brings strength to not do it again? One actually brings action the other does nothing. I know which opportunity one I’d rather seize as my inherently and fundamentally flawed human being self..

When we can’t sense the spirit registering this level of mercy and can’t let this sink in to act on it, it does become very difficult to show others the same mercy as you haven’t even allowed yourself to be shown it by God. It’s still there if you want it, so don’t punish yourself and others for your inability to go naked before God and surrender and then punish someone else by your actions of ‘un-forgiveness’ towards them, with the same fate that you chose willingly which is to hide and not address it to move on. God by his very nature is love and that’s why he forgives you, He embodies it, gives it first which is why we are even able to appreciate and love him as he loves and forgives us when we are so unworthy of it. Your friend may be unworthy but do it. He loves you irrespective of you loving him back. He knows nothing but Agape love towards you, which is what we as Christians, Christ followers and imitators need to start showing people. Unconditional love and grace to those who do not deserve it or even give it back to you. A love that is sacrificial of your own feelings and agenda’s of the flesh  as your spirit knows that in loving this way it builds the kingdom of God and does no turn people away, it brings them closer. The parable of the prodigal son describes this perfectly.


Parable of the prodigal son (Luke 15: 11 -32)

Jesus used parables which are made up stories to teach and illustrate spiritual things to his disciples and those who could not understand it if he was just to say it as simply as it was, so if you do not know the story of the prodigal son, I would highly recommend you read it and be lead by the spirit to encounter the revelation directly through God’s words himself and it’s about 2 sons and a father. One son decides to take his inheritance from his living father and leaves his house and blows it on all things worldly whilst the other son stayed at home and continued to serve the fathers land etc. The son was so lost in the worldly things he got himself caught up in it got to a point he was living and eating with pigs as he had no money and had nothing but pride as he did  not want to return to his fathers home as he was ashamed. I’m sure once realising that when you have nothing, your father (heavenly father) is everything you have, and he decided to return home to his father and his brother. His father welcomed him with open arms and had a feast/party for him and shared how he had forgiven him the moment he walked out his door. There is another angle regarding the second son, but different lesson, for a different day.

The parable principle of forgiving someone the moment they do it is the key part of this story. That sort of forgiveness only can come from humility and possessing a love that builds a home and does not destroy it. A love that builds the Kingdom of God, not darkness. The father in the story knew nothing of the sinful things the son did with his hard earned money, the beggars life the boy lived and the hardships he suffered but as the person forgiving he needed not know these things in order to forgive. He didn’t need to know that the son has suffered from his wrong mistake, the son had been punished spiritually and emotionally, that the son has been taught the lessons, the father just as a faithful servant of God who knows he fights and deals with people on our behalf, knew that he must forgive him 1) to move on with his life in the present and not be in a place outside of God’s protection because of disobedience and would think evil and bad thoughts about his ungrateful child, and 2) for the bigger picture in the future, so he was able to welcome him back home accordingly in a loving way that will make him want to stay home. He builds a home, not destroys it, Are we as witness and God’s megaphones on this earth forgiving and loving people in a way that they want to know the God we serve to come and dwell with Him in the Kingdom and are we forgiving and loving so that God is ready to welcome them home after he sorts them out in a way we can’t see but trust he will and won’t question it as who are we? We need to when we forgive stay focused on our witness and what are actions and reactions are illustrating to the world of believers and unbelievers. We set standards by our conduct – is it the right one your setting by actually forgiving in your heart first to let it show on the outside?

As the parable of the Prodigal son shows, forgiveness was giving well in advance of the son ‘s return home even after all that he had done because of the love between them. Because of the agape unconditional love we are called to show other people (Matthew 5: 44) when they lie, persecute, hurt or sin against you, we have the ability through humility which is a love trait (1 Corinthians 13:4-8) to forgive and welcome them back home with open arms as if they had not done anything. That is the same eyes of forgiveness that God see’s us through and is the second part in the two step process of forgiveness – actually forgiving them in way that is is forgotten as love has no memory of wrong (1 Corinthians 13: 4-8) and we need to break that worldly saying of ‘Forgive and don’t forget’ as we know God fights our battles and if you forgive and they do it again, God see that and he is the judge and executioner, we are called to do nothing but sit still (Exodus 14: 14) and do what we are instructed which is to be Christ-like and forgiving 77x (Matthew 18: 21-22) as we need to be focused on the other persons salvation coming through our witness of showing them that there is a God we serve that is bigger than us who has given us a power to not react in a way that is natural to this world and still have peace about a situation and be happy and secondly we know that we forgive for ourselves so that we have no sinful feeling, emotions that promote our flesh and ourselves when we are supposed to be front-line kingdom of God fighters.

I have a love hate relationship with this notion of a circle getting smaller – love to love it as I invest more of myself in to the relationships I have and get back much better quality friendships, but hate the feeling of having let down someones expectations of friendships as we are taught to believe they are supposed to last forever. This illusion is true to a certain extent as of course God wants you to build his kingdom with like minded people (Amos 3: 3) but the reality is that people change, people grow, people evolve. So nonetheless you must guard your heart above all else. I struggled with the idea that when I cut people off i’m also feeding into this worlds ideas of how people who once were family are now strangers, which without even considering can unconsciously chip in to our idea of our relationship with God and how he might abandon you or you will leave him and it all sets in as you start to become less and less familiar with Him the more you practice cutting off relationships, especially God intended ones. However, the beauty of obedience and as I grow and more mature in Him spiritually, the more comfortable and at ultimate peace I feel about the people that come and sometimes leave my life because ultimately we know everyone ain’t heading to the same destination as you so does that mean you get off a their stop? No you keep pushing. This is the only secret I have to share – just keep going.

God will start to weed away friends for you expectedly and unexpectedly. The unexpected weeding, well that one will be the friends that how you stopped speaking, why you stopped speaking and why you still don’t speak doesn’t make sense and life long friendships shouldn’t of ended like that, but they are the friends God’s clearing out your life and your room as they are occupying mind and heart space that God needs to take back. He needs more of you before you even know its him that is taking it back and removing friends because you’ve pushed him so far out of the picture you can’t hear feel or see him any longer. God needs to clear our workloads, help us by making us unemployed, help up us by giving up our idols of this world, make us friend-less, boyfriend/girlfriend-less and unseen to the world to give us tunnel vision to focus  on Him. He wants us to re-calibrate our thinking and seek him as the new occupant of this time and space to let (Matthew 6: 33) and then he slowly but surely when its His perfect time, will reveal it is him everything else be added – and hindsight will be a beautiful thing.

The hardest expected transition of friends and weeding them away is the wordly friends you still have after your saved because to complete the purpose of your life are the type of friends you need at this point are solely the one the bible describes as the ones where you will be safe in wise counsel (Proverbs 11: 14) and you will forgive and discuss the offence and move on (Matthew 18: 15). A brother who you can both grow together through that nakedness we discussed but remember God is intentional above all. There is a reason why wordly friends stick around only a short while after the re-birth in Christ as they are they to teach you many things about mainly serve as a reminder how different and set apart you are now so you can perceive what God is doing as you should (Isaiah 43: 19). Remember God uses people and circumstances, so you need to seize the opportunity to practice building up your spirit of discernment between worldly friends and brothers and sisters in Christ because the two might look the same on the outside but very different on the inside and will change you by their very presence in your life by the accountability they bring.

So whilst you still have your worldly friends be sensitive to what God is calling you to be and say in their lives but you need to be forgiving of the not met expectations you had of your worldly friends, which is that they will grow with you as you do but that is just not the case when it comes to spiritual matters. It will feel like you are loosing something, but you need to let that idea go, forgive them in your heart for not being that best friend for life you both promised you would be, that isn’t by any fault of their own but their season with you is over and you need to hold on tight with both hands for the journey God is about to take you on. Wordly friends will distract and disrupt the plans God has for you as they still want to do things which we can’t and hate to do because its not their time to be called yet (and we keep praying after we leave they get called!) but those things you did with them before we now repulse because you know our God. You carry his heart and the things of it, meaning you despise the things he does, and this will be a tough time as your identity is changing but be sure and encouraged your identity and who you are is shaping and moulding in to something better. Breaking away from from worldly friends is especially hard in the era we live with social media, Instagram, Snapchat, Facebook etc reminding you of your old life, old friends and old ways constantly but stay focused and remember in that you are signalling to heaven you are committed and ready for the next step in the process.

Cutting them off can conflict with your mandate and call to be a witness of God and his love of all people and types but know that some people can’t and will never be able to hack/take/comprehend the Jesus you know who has made you a new creature because it requires them to change and make sacrifice of the wordly things they know and love when they were never willing to forfeit, but you were and that is fine. Keep getting to know this Jesus and be set apart (Matthew 5: 13-16) and as you know, salt is flavouring and adds seasoning but not one grain of salt can do that alone, God will bless and restore the friends you’ve lost with Godly friends who will stretch you with God, challenge you to do better, encourage and inspire your faith which will increase your witness and will stick closer than a brother (meaning be better friends than the ones you knew) as they will become your Kingdom family who will war together the flesh (Proverbs 18: 24). The whole of Proverbs will tell you the value the wise and brotherhood relationships that build not only you to be the person God called, but builds you for your family’s sake, your careers sake and for the Kingdom of God to advance it in every way imaginable and unimaginable.  Love, forgive and hold on to these friends as the devil wants to destroy these ones the most as it pushes God first before anything.


The next part will be “People & Relationships: Transformation” which alongside the friendships angle, we will discuss more about marriage from this perspective as I focused more on friendships in this part 1.

Till next time,



Scriptures in order of appearance:

  • Matthew 6: 34
  • Jeremiah 29: 11
  • Proverbs 4: 23
  • Luke 9: 28- 36
  • Matthew 22: 14
  • Malachi 6: 1
  • Romans 8
  • 2 Corinthians 10: 3-4
  • Luke 15: 11 -32
  • Matthew 5: 44
  • 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
  • Exodus 14: 14
  • Matthew 18: 21-22
  • Amos 3: 3
  • Matthew 6: 33
  • Proverbs 11: 14
  • Matthew 18: 15
  • Matthew 5: 13-16
  • Proverbs 18: 24




Happy Fathers day Our Heavenly Father: Honouring thy Mother and thy Father

As fathers day is fast approaching this Sunday, I started to reflect on the importance of why this is the first commandment with a promise attached to it that we should honour our father and our mothers (Ephesians 6: 2-3). I went on to look at the way this scripture was intentional with the wording and structure (This is extremely important when you are learning how to read the bible to understand the language and intention of God which I will do a post on separately) and came to realise that honouring our fathers came before honouring our mothers in the sequence of words used. This made so much sense to me spiritually as Our Heavenly father is the one we seek to honour daily with our lives and therefore because our fathers are the ones that are currently (or should have been) leading our homes in a way that shapes us to be who we are today to honour God accordingly. Society seems to focus a lot on Mothers day and naturally a lot more honouring is done on that day because 9/10 we feel more emotionally and physically connected to our loving and affectionate mothers who have a natural maternal instinct and they carried and knew us first in this world. However it made me realise how easily we fail to understand that without both parents, regardless of the life experiences or status of your relationships now, our mothers would have never been our mother to love and cherish the way we do if our fathers didn’t exist, same way if God didn’t create this world in the very beginning there would be nothing to have dominion over and we would not be here. Therefore the same honouring and appreciation is due on to your father too. Honour is also a form of thanksgiving and thanksgiving is rich in value in the Kingdom of God, and fathers day to give thanks and much value to your relationship with your father. Love and appreciation are change agents, they can add and turn around any situation you you thought that couldn’t be changed because of the power of a simple thank-you that screams a million and one things.

Ephesians 6: 1 reads:

 “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honour your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise—“so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.”

The bible instructs us to walk obediently in this that we must honour both, so we must also remember that if this is happening in the physical, something is most definitely happening in the spiritual as that’s where we should be discerning and calling out the enemy by name and biding the havoc he is trying to cause back to the Kingdom of Darkness that it came from. When we praise God our father, he is being honoured with our thanksgiving (Psalm 69: 30), ladies and gents it is time we honour our father, it is time to honour as we honour God our parents – more importantly honour our fathers in same measure we honour our mothers on mothers day because as the bible says in 1 John 4: 20 “If anyone says I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.” your brother are those around you, you can’t love your mother and hate (or show less love in some instances) to your father and say you love God, it is a lie the devil has got you to believe! You can’t love God truly without being obedient to his word which is to honour your mother and father, no matter what as there ain’t no ‘if hes not present’ or if buts and maybes in the scripture and we are obedient first before we are anything.

We must continue to remind ourselves that also in the spiritual God is the mother and father (and judge of widows – Psalm 68: 5), illustrating the physical importance of needing to honour both so that you are able to honour God accordingly in the spiritual as having a lack of respect or honour for one parent physically will alter and hinder all the respect and hon our that is truly due on to God in the spiritual as we should walk in spirit not flesh, so that is the most important realm to consider here. when you honour your parents, you are actually honouring God in the spiritual just like as we know, when we submit on to our husbands ladies we are actually submitting on to God, hence why God is the judge to widows once their husbands depart he gets you to focus back on honouring him in the spiritual and physical as his physical representation is gone but the need to still honour still exists – this is why the enemy tries to attack relationships as healthy, functioning, positive relationships that make you grow are dangerous to the kingdom of Darkness as they know that will reflect in your spiritual relationship with God, also why the greatest commandment is to love God and then those around you as all the laws hang on to these two things (Matthew 22: 36-40) where love exists, where relationships grow especially parental and martial ones being the two most attacked relationships as theses are so crucial to building a good home on a foundation of God (Psalm 127: 1) it is extremely important to gate-keep with God (Nehemiah 7: 1-2), guard our hearts against the devil hardening them (Proverbs 4:23), turn the other cheek to not do wrong to another because of the evil one’s trickery in to using you as a weapon for his works (Matthew 5: 39), the list is endless but it is all in order to maintain a healthy idea of what a relationship should truly look like which is love which conquers all and so the Kingdom of God is advanced and the devil loses. God lives in people meaning the relationships we hold with one another really is a relationship that mirrors in the spiritual to having a healthier relationship with Christ as he is everywhere and in everything and everyone.

The devil always will attack directly what God has instructed you to be obedient about, he’ll go straight to the source and try to uproot the understanding of what it is in your mind so that you 1. begin to forget why you must do it and he’ll attempt to distract you with the busyness of ‘life’ to make it seem like an effort 2.  and that “busyness” depletes our energy, especially if we are giving our energy to the wrong things and then you are too to confront his demons – he uses the desire of our flesh that promote thy self to do both of these things that’s why we must fix our minds on God things and fill our energy up with it (Philippians 4: 6-8). Our destiny depends on this effort and energy. someones destiny in the spiritual and the physical can be destroyed without even knowing it because they focused on the wrong thing, he knows that if he breaks, destroys, taints and creates hard hearts towards your earthly father also that you will never be cable to have a warm, open, submissive and loving heart towards your father who you trust entirely because you know that the plans he has for you were good, even before you were formed in the womb (Jeremiah 1: 5) – so if knowing this we must discern and ask ourselves, why would my God , our father who loves us unconditionally and beyond our own imagination, would he it is because the devil is a liar and seeks to destroy your understanding of the importance of the relationships and moves you make on earth, and deceive you in to thinking its okay to be bitter, hard, and not respectful to someone who may have not been what you expected, but remember that expectation comes from knowing the capability and the love of your heavenly father, who to be honest put you through storms and season – but do we not still trust and build a relation ship with him through it all and see at the end how it was for our own good and how perfectly his plan worked out? that spiritual mindset and walk we have with our Heavenly father is exactly the same mentality we must adopt towards our earthly fathers and honour them in the same way as the father relationship the devil is seeking to destroy in the flesh is the mirror image of how your relationship should be with you father – do a sincerely honest heart check, how does your relationship look with your dad look? Does it mirror the relationship you have with your heavenly father? is one better than the other and if so are you struggling to – the devil tries to destroy the understanding of what true relationships should look like and unfortunately where true love is involved it is not always going to be what you wanna hear or see when someone is correcting you or discipline you in the way they see best , but it is not up to you to dictate to God or your father how to love you best and their first and foremost mission and job is to make sure you are raised up right, not what your interests of what that may be because sometimes, more times than none, we get things wrong for ourselves and learn through mistakes! God our father and your father do not want that for you! Do not let the enemy deceive you in to thinking otherwise! Love does not lie and open rebuke (against your wrongdoing) is better than love carefully concealed, just to not hurt your feelings (Proverbs 27: 5). To just and only show you “love” they way you want it is not true love as love builds on the imperfect human you are, that kind of appeasing type of love is not love it is infatuation as true love, God’s love is long-suffering (1 Corinthians 13: 4) as it builds.

In life we sometimes get so confused on what we should be focusing on because we think we are in control as we put one foot in front of the other to walk this walk. However we are not in control of anything as by his grace, instruction and God’s sheer will for your life is the only reason why we get up each morning, can take a breath and lift up our legs to walk this walk each day therefore God should rightfully be out only audience and focus in life and we should have a sharpened vision of only him that causes us not to care about what is going on around us and before and after he instructs you to do it as we are only servants here as vessels to be used and we cannot forget that. In this unfortunate state of being unfocused from God we begin to take our mind off of the instructions God has given us and focus on how we can dictate through our feelings towards situations or people, how they should act because of how it affects you but that is not what God called you to do. God did not call you to live in your emotions and flesh to try and dictate to your parents how they should raise you as your parents are following a specific set of instructions and are being given a word by God on how to train a child up as they should go (Proverbs  22: 6) because then you are supposed to play your part and go – do not try and play a role in a story that was never assigned to you. As you are not your parent’s God that gave them that instruction, let whatever they do go or bad be between them and their God, not between you and them as you are powerless in the way this plays out as you can not see the plan and whilst you’re there busy worrying about others salvation, what is the state of yours?! Ephesians 6: 1 says ‘Children,obey your parents in the Lord for this is right.’ You are pro-longing your next move or blessing from God if you are sitting outside in the waiting room of obedience which is called ‘the lounge of disobedience’ and you can be sitting in the waiting room, being disobedient about something God has called you do and be in that spot for 3 months, 1 year and 50 years if you do not step out of that room of disobedience and enter the room of obedience and obey and honour. When God present your name to be called in that lounge jump at the opportunity to enter the room of obedience where you can take the opportunity to fix it like on a a day like fathers day to pour out God’s love – seize every opportunity (Ephesians 5: 16) to exit the realm of disobedience and honour your father, step up to the call God is giving you to turn your situation around. I learnt that through obedience to the instruction God has given you even though it may be painful to endure or be subject to there is always a better outcome on the other side, I was taught this through a revelation I had in disciplining my dog Dixon – I don’t have children (yet in Jesus name!) so my dog-child will have to do ahha!

I was sweeping up after Dixon one day after he made a complete and utter mess with one of his toy he ripped up (check out my ‘MollyMonstz’ on here with my Vlogs which rants this kind of behaviour *rolls eyes*) and I was looking at him looking at me with his sorry ass face in his play pen I locked him in and I was pitying him toying with the idea to let him out. However the Holy Spirit quickly entered the room to teaching me an understanding about my spiritual relationship. God show showed me he and I are like Dixon and I. He is my father and I am his child. I choose to act, he doesn’t punish me but allows me to go through the pain of the growth that must come with it if it was the wrong action. He doesn’t abandon my call, which is why I was still letting Dixon out to eat and go outside, but we and in Dixon’s position when it’s our Heavenly father dealing with us, must go through the pain to be free from captivity of the sin to get the beauty of it. I didn’t want to punish him just as God doesn’t want us to be hurt, but it is necessary to make him in who I want him to be which is a great.  I was able through the relationship I have with God, tap in to the understanding of how God our father and I as Dixon’s mum, sees us in our different seasons of growth and how strong he has to be because of how much he loves us enough to see it through to the end as he sees how that growth will be life changing, even though Dixon was over there looking sorry, much like we are usually before God after he convicts us about a sin we come to say sorry for. He doesn’t buy it and won’t move you on till the captivity of the sin is gone.

The Holy Spirit spoke quickly again and made me aware of the difference between saying sorry (asking for forgiveness) and actually meaning your sorry and really meaning that you will never do it again, parents know the difference as they know their children. God will not stop putting you through seasons, which some may look like different scenarios as I don’t only discipline Dixon when he rips up toys but for other things too, the 3 underlying principles that is remain present during every ‘season’ or disciplining session with is that 1) He loves you 2) He doesn’t want to hurt you 3) But this is necessary for you, not for God although ultimately he will benefit from it in the bigger picture. The last one is the most important as God goes out of his way to create us and shape us, that takes effort as does it take double the effort to go an discipline Dixon and then go and clean up after him – why wouldn’t I just save the effort and deal with the cleaning? Because I don’t want him to have to keep getting disciplined as it’s not nice, but beneficial – God see’s us the same way as do our parents. They love us enough that the charge God gave them over your life, they must complete to train us up accordingly, which is more important to stay steadfast on than to submit to your ‘sorry face/emotions’ that indicate you have felt but haven’t learnt and fail you in their God-given. That would be a job half done and as that leads to destruction and as once you grow up,  you do adult things (1 Corinthian 13: 11) you have left their protection and be easy prey for the enemy to use as he wishes as forms of weapons in this world if they did not train you up properly in the way of the Lord. Your parents are training you, honour them for their labour, their charge from the Lord that they must stay faithful to and honour them for honouring God and never being disobedient. I want you to understand this story and have it in the back of your mind to reflect on how God works through relationships so they must all reflect your relationship with him. Dixon is now a changed dog, he hardly if ever  steps out and does something or has the same issues before (sound familiar like when God changes up permanently and we don’t repeat the same sins no more and we move up levels with him?) and I am thankful for God giving me the strength to see me through the disciplining seasons as its no easy, show the same grace and understanding to your parents.

Okay, so some people’s parents don’t quite fulfil the meaning or role of that word. Alright, that’s fine because you know why? That is not your account to give God on your day of judgement (Romans 14: 12), it is theirs. We just need to focus, stand upright and remain blameless and do as we are instructed for our own good. You may think that they may have not been a mum or dad when you needed them to be. Or they don’t understand you. Or even that they must not love you at times (which is just crazy as they wouldn’t of had you) but the fact is, when we even think or entertain these thoughts or similar thoughts we play right in to the hands of the devil when we rebel against our parents because he doesn’t want yo to turn the other cheek, he wants and likes you heart hard and its a double win because he has broken your home. Don’t sin through disobedience and cause two wrongs from what could have been one to fix. The understanding of what home is has been tarnished by you being led in the flesh to rebel against your parents as you want independence etc, you know Satan rebelled against his father as he thought he knew best too? I think we all know how that turned out and will turn out because God wins. Let God win now before its too late and the devil would have distracted you long enough with a hard heart that God couldn’t enter it and dwell there. Do not let the devil rob your God-given place in heaven at his right hand side because of the sacrifice of love he gave us. Do not let the enemy win.

God made no mistake on who he called to be your parents trust me. The truth of the matter is whatever you may think of your parents, bottom line is that they love you and only want to do the best by you and for you. So when God allows some irresponsible fathers to leave that same fact applies too, your heavenly father is giving you his very best, he is giving you direct access and focus to be placed on him so it allows you to honour live and direct in the physical and spiritual with no middle man! He still remains father and motherless to the mother and fatherless and trust me when I say this that he has not forgotten you, you are just being raised up differently just like everyone else is in the world, no parents or household is the same. This isn’t anything or even a burden to carry with sorrow as honestly speaking it is better as you learn to see spiritual things way before most people in life which is a true and utter blessing as you are able to practice discernment because you know your father and had to carefully listen to hear and feel him properly through prayer. You have also benefited from God not allowing any human to mess up your destiny in a physical form of a father that is supposed to replicate him in heaven as God is not cowardly and too weak to overcome the plot of the devil to destroy relationships, so God will never allow another imperfect and frail man on earth to come and taint the view of who a father is supposed to be (which is a mirror of him) to come and destroy your God ordained destiny (Ezekiel 18: 2-3) Nope. No way. Never. God will only place another father in your life that is capable to be someone who steps up, honours God, is submissive on to God, a leader, a protector, a provider, a strong hand, a comforter, a teacher, someone who instils values in you, instils honour, guides you, disciplines you and loves you in a way that he is willing to sacrifice his life for you – that is the only type of father on earth God will allow to remain in your life.

If your father is still in the picture but isn’t these things, pray hard and petition and pray earnestly, remembering the grace God gives you daily for your transgressions and remembering that your parents just as simply humans are subject to the exact same attacks in life by the devil that we are also subject to as they are not superheros and do sometimes get things wrong. Pray that the hold the enemy has over your father’s destiny to be the things and more is released and broken in the mighty name of Jesus and pray that the man God ordained and placed him in your life to be shall come to pass in the mighty name of Jesus and God is not a man that should lie, therefore your father thus says the Lord are those things. Amen! God made no mistake on who your parents were. Not one mistake, whether or not you choose to see the beauty in what God has given you to sometimes cultivate you in love and sometimes through challenges, it always boils down to how you perceive a circumstance to get the outcome you desire. Our parents were given a love so deep for us it actually surpasses our understanding of what we think love is its that deep but it is because of the connection you have. By blood, by proximity and by a relationship we built with them through vulnerability we were as a child. That is exactly what God is desiring from all us in a deep and challenging way, as we all know we may fight scream and kick about how we feel about our parents but when it boils down to it we run back to our God given family and we find a solace and peace in them if we a humble enough to see the beauty in what God has given. That’s exactly what you wants from you. Don’t let the devil win. Shine your God given light of the world (Matthew 5:14) as it drives our darkness. Love trumps hate and conquers all, love our heavenly father by honouring your father and open the floodgates of heaven to fulfil that which he has promised to you that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth because of the honour we give on to God. Amen.


I would suggest taking a physical step of faith that God has gone before you to help honour your father on Fathers day (or any day of the year) by using your fathers ‘ Love Language’ which can be words of affirmation, gifts, touching, acts of service or quality time to get the ball rolling (link which explains what they are and how effective they are) – it would be extremely effective in communicating honour and do so much for your relationship. As God loved us first before we could love him, he made this relationship with him possible so in the same way love your earthly father first and invest yourself vulnerably in him and you will be fulfilling the law of the word and filling up your love tanks. Love wins. We win. God wins.

Till next time,



Scriptures in order of appearance:

  • Ephesians 6: 1 -4
  • Psalm 69: 30
  • 1 John 4: 20
  • Psalm 68: 5
  • Matthew 22: 36-40
  • Psalm 127: 1
  • Nehemiah 7: 1-2
  • Proverbs 4: 23
  • Matthew 5: 39
  • Philippians 4: 6-8
  • Jeremiah 1: 5
  • Proverbs 27: 5
  • 1 Corinthians 13: 4
  • Proverbs  22: 6
  • Ephesians 5: 16
  • 1 Corinthian 13: 11
  • Romans 14: 12
  • Ezekiel 18: 2-3
  • Matthew 5:14



Control Freak Nature

I spoke very briefly about how I used to have a condition I like to call control freak nature (CFN) in my pre-salvation days in the post ‘The Paradox of Choice: Is too much choice a bad thing’. It made me really reflect on how much control was something I really struggled with and didn’t realise how crucial it was for this mindset to change so I could have full access to God. Exodus 14: 14 is my scripture of life when it comes to facing difficult situations and making sure I don’t act in a way that destroys the kingdom of God I am trying to build. When I hold on to that scripture, time and time again, it never fails, as God never does when it says to “Be still and let God fight for you” – when you think you’re in control by your actions and reactions to situations you can never be still and let God do him as you believe whatever you do is gonna produce the results you may or may not even desire, but we as Christians who know God fights on our behalf, we simply just know better. Where we know better, we must do better. We know God dictates, is control of everything and is the author and finisher of our lives, but often when we forget this and in that we disobey and step out on God in that we should just be still, so we can remain pure and blameless.

We attempt to control what the maker of the universe is doing in our lives as if we have a real say in how things work, and this delusion feels very real, but that’s just it, it is a feeling. Feelings are not facts. There are bigger things at play here fighting the will of God because they know how important it is to obey God’s word because it saves you from an eternity in hell, they understand the value of a saved soul – do you? These feelings can even disillusion us to live against the word of God and leads us to live a life of sin unknowingly and knowingly ie homosexuality because as feelings can shape our thoughts, however, we know God is not moved by emotions therefore your feelings are irrelevant, your obedience even when your feelings tell you contrary is relevant. We start to live in the lie of because we think, walk and talk for ourselves we think that we subsequently have control over our bodies and thoughts. Wrong. Because that means we are forsaking the truth that we are vessels, shells, modes of transport for God’s word and will to plague this earth and be done to build a better kingdom in eternity of which we all have a stake and investment in. We do have free will, of course that is right, but that free will is God given and has a purpose attached to your purpose. In that free will we possess, we should choose from one of those two options I discussed in my last post, to obey God and relinquish all control to him to be able to be obedient to his will and way – when we give it all up this makes it a lot easier to live in fruitfulness of the understanding we have that you serve a higher purpose and that we are living sacrifices (Romans 12) with the deeper understanding that we are vessels with a purpose. We are here to live for God, not for our own appeasement, and in that obeying his commandments helps us live for him. They are not ‘rules’ there to torment us, although your flesh may think otherwise, but as children of God we live and strive to walk in our spirit not flesh. God has given us the ability to make the choice of choosing him from this illusion of what free will is. He knows that when he created humans he placed an inherent nature in us that we like to feel in control, so he gives us the ability to exercise this desire with free will – we just have to be sure to make the choice for ourselves to follow him when we can (before he does it himself)! as God works best with surrender.

God knows and so do we, what the power of what a submissive witness can do – Jesus showed us and that is why we aspire to be like him because his witness as a human was so powerful. If God has saved souls on this earth like Jesus who choose to follow him and everything he is with all their heart, mind, body and soul, he knows that when he begins the work in them, they will reap from the harvest and they will never abandon him because we are an entitled generation and in that we wouldn’t wanna step out of the spiritual covering of obedience that brings favor. We think we should get and deserve things we don’t deserve, even understand or could fathom the use of these things (this entitlement topic is a wholeeeee other post) but he uses that entitlement nature to pull us in with the blessings of obedience which are priceless – this is the point I am at with God now and truly there is no turning back. I’ve seen, been through and heard too much to know categorically that I can not do better and in regards to the little control I have over my life (free will) is to ensure I am actively working towards being filled with the spirit to allow it to control my flesh to obey God’s word over my flesh controlling me because as we know the spirit and flesh are constantly at war. That is the extent of the control I have in my life, everything else is left for God to figure out. This is done happily as there is some weight I can not even imagine bearing. God didn’t tell us to turn the other cheek (Matthew 5: 39), have humility and forgive your brother 77x (Matthew 18: 21-22) because he thinks we as his children should be branded as “mugs” in this world, no that’s not how my God works. God is telling you I will handle them they are my children too, you just focus on you. When we’re set apart, which is by our speech, thoughts and actions, we answer in a different way which is recognisable in the world we are set apart in (Kingdom of God) as obedience – when we obey because we have surrendered control over the situation to God by our actions of turning the cheek etc God comes through and fights for us spiritually to allow us to walk in the physical victory which when you learn humility, turning the other cheek etc you have peace which is priceless. CFN is no joke, it can block all type of spiritual and physical blessings especially if you are unaware of it being a hindrance.

The book of Job Study

I love the book of Job for several reasons stemming from his powerful witness of his life which depicts who God is. I believe his witness covers so many different lessons that we can all take heed of in this era, but today’s focus on Job is regarding having everything and being in control of that physically when your Christian and understanding what is going on spiritually when the God who gave it takes it away? God builds and keeps you (to the extent that your shakable foundation will allow) to destroy you to use the same bricks of your rebuild you with a better, unbreakable foundation in him and infrastructure. Job is described in the very first verse of the book as an upright, blameless and God fearing man – so firstly in life it is important to understand and establish who God has created you to be, which will be in his likeliness oppose to the colourful characteristics brush this world would like to paint you with if you allow it. The Bible didn’t start by saying he is a handsome, hench or buff, rich, popular man although he may have been. God and the characteristics that he sees in your heart which dictates your value to him, came first regardless of your ability to control a situation, your body goals by plastic surgery or the gym, or the outcome or your life, God comes first as he is in control. God controls the way you should shape your characteristics, if Job wasn’t God fearing he couldn’t have been any of the other things. He was God fearing because he lived knowing that God was in control of his whole life, family, wealth and riches that without him giving it he would not have it (Chapter 2: 9-10). He was fearful of stepping out of the realm of obedience he lived in which had him surrounded in blessings – the fear of losing that safety God gave him, allowed him to relinquish control of his life to God as God did more for Job than even Job himself could ever imagine. Job’s God fearing nature is honestly my desire in life, as it should be all of ours. For me it is one of Job’s best qualities because it only exists because of the understanding Job had of what a true relationship with God embodies – which is love.

When we allow our feelings or emotions to cloud our thoughts into thinking to act in a certain way to control a situation and it’s outcome, we forget God and the intentional control he exercises over our lives and that is he not moved by our emotions, hence why Job shoned his wife when she spoke from her emotions. That’s why we trust, when we trust we build up faith and when we build up faith we are not walking by sight because we trust God. It is a loop that we need to practice walking around in, as the moment we step out we are walking in dangerous territory. When Job lost everything and cursed God for a whole chapter (and a bit – see chapter 3) there are still another 42 chapters in Job!! God again is not moved by your emotions, which is where you get the courage from to control a situation, he has a will over your life that comes before your emotions! God gave us a snippet of who he had built Job up to be in only 2 chapters, and then destroyed him and if we’re being honest, even that man in 2 chapters many of us would desire to reach that level with God – isn’t it funny how we sell ourselves short of our 42+ chapters we have to go with God because we wish to stay stuck, stay in control of only a slice of our blessings? God builds you up to destroy the things that hold you captive in this world, ie in Job’s case fear (Chapter 3: 25) and uses those same building blocks to take you on a journey in life that may be tough as you bare your heart nakedly and openly to him, but he will build you up just as he did with Job in those 42 chapters later on to someone better. Just let go and let him do him.

Nothing happens in this world without God’s permission (Job 1: 6), so two important observations I made in the beauty of hindsight in my post-salvation days is that 1) God knew I needed to be that person in the previous seasons of my life to use it get through what he knew was going to be a roller coaster (as like in Job) and if I wasn’t able to control my reactions, decisions and emotions in line with an understanding I have of who God is (even if it wasn’t as deep as it is now) and who he is during these times of storms and sunshine, I would guaranteed be a broken and completely different person not being able to write these posts for you. But because of how the grace and restoration of God works with the experiences of your life, God was ever gonna forsake me or forget why he brought me through what he has which is why 2)He also knew because of the “controlling” person I used to be over every situation in my life, for me to really relinquish all control over to him he knew he would have me completely. Anyone who has CFN or low levels of it knows that they would never relinquish complete control over to someone else unless they knew categorically that person could do it better. When God starts taking you through seasons (which I guarantee he will if you’re living a life for him) and nothing you are doing is changing or helping the season, is it time for you to step out and say “God, I know you can do it better – do you“? Unless God builds the house and you allow him to, you labour in your controlling behaviour in vain and if God is not guarding your heart and in return you trusting him, you protect yourself in vain (Psalm 127: 1) – Let God take control.

He builds to destroy  – God created you to be someone for a specific season, embrace it

As with the different weather season bring different benefits to our one year and similarly, we have seasons of change from happy to beautiful to challenging and tough times in our lives just like spring, summer, autumn and winter. Tree’s do what they are inherently designed to do, like Jesus said (Luke 6: 43) a good tree cannot be confused and bear bad fruit – we need to trust what God has inherently implanted us to do which is be a good tree and bear the God fruit through submission to do what we are supposed to be here to do which is live for his purpose, for his will that he knows and is in control of. Do not hold on to that person God created you to be in that one season if it is not conducive to the rest of the several seasons that are to come that will ultimately shape your life in a beautiful and unified way with the past and future seasons to come. The trees do not hold on to their winter benefits of shedding leaves and being bare when it comes a time for spring – if trees weren’t blossoming flowers and leaves in Spring we would be very confused and feel like what is going on? The feeling of being between seasons will have you feeling just as lost if we don’t allow God to control our lives and help us change seasons, just as he helped the trees change seasons by giving them extra sunlight to grow in the seasons of spring and summer. Don’t hold on to the winter person God created to see you through that seasons when you are now clearly in spring. Don’t allow a new season and its molding of who you are and its blessings get put on hold because you are confused about what season you’re in because you haven’t relinquished control, embrace the change no matter how hard it is to grow through maybe that tough season as I can most assuredly tell you there is a more beautiful season waiting for you on the other side of obedience.

To then rebuild with a better infrastructure with better tools – The reward for letting go

Trees will tell you this time and time again that the embraced change of seasons is a beautiful thing. There is a reward when you naturally just let God and let God carry you through life and its changing seasons. Study the stories of Abraham and his ultimate sacrifice, Job and his blameless nature,  Ruth and the ability to let go of her feelings and not try and control your destiny like Naomi and followed her mother to a greater destiny than she could have imagined just by being obedient to the practices God has put in place to help you and God will live with you (John 14: 23). Or simply just look at Jesus who we aim to be like. He lived and was molded in to a carpenter, to be a man with the necessary skills to build the kingdom of God 30 years prior to actually stepping in to God’s plan. Only a few chapters discuss the 30 years before but once he was baptised around the 3rd chapters, he had another 30-ish chapters to go which covered 3 years where God saw him through seasons as man that lived for him, he was tested. God built him to rebuild him better. God will test us in these seasons, test to see how strong your foundation is, how weak it is as he wants it to withstand all seasons no matter the conditions as he wants to know and see where your heart is to and if we truly have a heart that beats for him. God wants our body mind and soul (Matthew 22: 37) you can’t give him bits and bobs as he will destroy the parts of you he doesn’t want, clear the rubbish away and use the pieces of you he has made strong to build you stronger in him through your spirit walk, not by being lead in your emotions and flesh.

Now to those fellow control freaks, we know how deep it cuts to be powerless in a situation but the difference of when you give God the control oppose to making choices for yourself is that your outcome will be much better – guaranteed. You have the facts (the Bible) that gives you so many examples that illustrate the reward of obedience time and time again – all those Bible stories contained promises which brought an unmerited amount of favor that we also have access to. When you give God the space to make choices in your life and stop fooling yourself that you have loads of choice on how to live for him, we can allow his will to be done through the obedience to his instructions and reject our version of how to live for him and let him decided that for us. This takes trust and faith in him completely, as any false idea of the ability make choices outside of his word you need to cast out of your mind as he does not fail as his way is perfect and proves to be true whilst he protects you (Psalms 18: 30) are you trusting him so he can protect you? The difference with me now is that I do not feel like I am missing out because I have less choice (if any to be honest) and less control over what happens in my life as I happily let God choose for me as his best is the best and I trust that. When you release control over something you are letting go of how you think that you have the ability as a human (which are limited in their capabilities) to do what’s best. The yoke is clearly unbearable as it states in the Bible (Acts 15: 10) so why if you are truly living for God do you think you can carry the yoke of life yourself?! You cannot!! You cannot control the outcome of things in your life even if because you may think we have free will you still cannot through that “choice” determine the outcome of your life as ultimately God does as he will U-turn you several times if need be until your back on the right path. This is why we sing “I surrender all” as we give it all back to God who is in control of everything carry it for you as cares for you and wants your burdens – (1 Peter 5: 7)!


Till next time,


Scriptures in order of apperance:

  • Exodus 14: 14
  • Romans 12
  • Matthew 5: 39
  • Matthew 18: 21-22
  • Job (whole book)
  • Job 1: 1
  • Job 3
  • Job 3: 25
  • Job 1: 6
  • Psalm 127: 1
  • Luke 6: 43
  • John 14: 23
  • Matthew 22: 37
  • Psalms 18: 30
  • Acts 15: 10
  • 1 Peter 5: 7

The Paradox of choice: Is too much choice a bad thing?

As I trust how and who God places in my life I have begun to see how truly blessed I am in theses areas of my life, all because I trust him. My lovely Lydia, she is my dear introvert extrovert, book lover and God-sent friend, who has been reading a book called “The Paradox of Choice: Why less is more” by Barry Schwartz for a minute now (check out her website reviewing them Once upon a Lydia). I trust and respect her opinion whether we agree or not as she is part of my Kingdom family and is my sister in Christ which I am extremely grateful for. (Side note: Someone once said to me “real opportunities don’t look like opportunities on the surface“, encouraging us to understand things aren’t handed to us on a plate but to take advantage of everything including the opportunity to build and surround yourself with Godly relationships which is so crucial in your walk as they’re filling your mind with God and not trash (1 Corinthians 15:33 – Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character). With this mindset I really urge you step out your comfort zone if you can’t feel God in it so you can take heed of your surroundings and tap in to what and the people God has placed around you to complete the work he has started in you. This is a whole other post but when God places you somewhere physically and spiritually he will give you the tools and accountability to help you complete the task he has called you to do there, regardless of whether task is started in your personal life or career it is all to build your skill set and ability to complete your purpose as that is all God is concerned with, your purpose.)

Anywho back to it, as we work together (and she is a chatterbox like moi) we’ve been speaking about this book a lot which is helping her “hashtag” #Adulting season become more productive. As the book is supposed to help you make better choices, which should really then produce better outcomes to your decisions, it should then subsequently improve your quality of life and help you become more discipline in life – it is a win win right?!  I trust her love of books, her love for God and the impact she has had in my life in such a short time as I know God was working in the career/job department of my life and assigned me here to serve him better at a time in my life he was asking me to go deeper in our relationship, so ultimately the amount of times this book has come up I knew it must be worth the read. Just as God would have it, I was asking God on what I should write about this week and then low and behold Lydia posted a long ‘rant-esque’ on this book which immediately reminded me of a scripture I always hold on and refer to when I find myself thinking or toying with the idea of stepping out on God to possibly be disobedient to his word, Deuteronomy 10:13 “and you must always obey the Lord’s commands and decrees that I am giving you today for your own good.” and this is focal point of this post. I don’t need to know why I must, I don’t even need to know (although I do) that God will bless me for being obedient – I just know we must obey the laws that are given and that automatically restricts the amount of choice I have to make over a situations I face. See when you go through certain things with God and he lets you get burnt when he told you to turn left and you went right, you quickly, with haste, fast fast learn to obey him as ultimately when you run out of turns to make on your own that lead to dead ends or are deeply in your soul unfulfilling you are going to turn right back around and walk the way he said to and it will always work out to be the right decision and 100x better than the direction and outcome you thought was the best when in fact God’s best is the real best. End of.

She posted the snapshots of the books analogy compared to the background logistics of arranged marriages which I heard my spirit scream “yasssss that’s is it!” as if my heart had found a way through words to describe how important it is to let go and let God choose everything for you in your life, not just your family, spouse or whatever the things you want his blessings in – everything. The snapchat revelation really made me go in to meditation about how to best describe the overwhelming feeling I had of how so spot on she was! I couldn’t stop speaking about the revelation to anyone and everyone who would listen and would show anyone who was willing to watch her snapchat, so I thought there’s no way I can’t write about it this week and not get her to contribute – what type of friend would I be to not force her to do something for me!? So this post is a little different and really embodies what I want this website to be which is a place to come together in the body of Christ and all contribute, so it is split between Lydia’s revelation written by Lydia, and then my revelation from her revelation (I tried so hard to make it short as possible as I knew I was sharing this post but not sure if i succeed, whelp).



We – who live in the privileged west – exist in a society that glorifies choice. Now more than ever, we are consistently pressured to have everything we want, when we want it and exactly how we want it. The message that our ability to choose makes us supreme is all around us and it is now reaching into how we view/define ourselves. We live in an era where people can choose, regardless of DNA and outside of their biology, which gender they are, they can even choose to be genderless. I am not against choice. I believe that the ability to choose is a good thing. If it wasn’t God would not have given it to us. The bible says in James 1:17 – Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. In Gods goodness he saw it fit to grant us the ability to choose. I recently read a book called The Paradox of choice. This book put forward the idea that too much choice is a bad thing and ultimately leads to dissatisfaction with life. Ever heard the saying “too much of a good thing is bad for you”? Yeah well that is what that author was discussing in this book.

Whilst reading, it occurred to me that as Christians, our love for choice may be the largest obstacle in our relationships with God. Because we LOVE choosing our own way, we wrestle with His Spirit. Constantly fighting to have things our way. The idea that following Christ means yielding to the boundaries that he sets us is a difficult pill to swallow. Many people profess to love God, many people will call themselves Christians but their love of Choice prevents them from truly following God.

On the topic of boundaries and the pain of choosing.

A long time ago, I read this scripture with a friend. Ecclesiastes 10:8. It reads: whoever digs a pit may fall into it; whoever breaks through a wall may be bitten by a snake.We discussed the idea that the boundary of the wall prevents a person from the danger of encountering a snake. God places boundaries around His children for their own protection. He limits the scope of our choice in order to save us from the pain of our choice.We think we know what we want & we can’t understand why a good God stands in the way of our choice but the question we need to ask is this: Can we bear the weight of the choices we make?

In the Garden of Eden, (See Genesis 3) Eve made a choice. She chose to choose, and her choice bought us death. Eve reached for something outside of the scope of choice the God had given her. Was the tree of “the knowledge of good and evil” the only fruit bearing tree in the garden? No. She had all the other choices of fruit to take. She could eat the fruit of ANY other TREE in the garden, but the fruit she chose to reach for was the one outside of the boundary that God had set for her. And with one bite, she bought us all death and destruction. With one choice she bought us pain. I often wonder if the first woman of all creation would have made the same choice had she known that it would doom all of creation to death.The point I am making is this. Christian, love your boundaries. They are the demonstration of God’s love and grace towards you. The truth is that as humans, we are prone to make the wrong choices and because of that God gives us boundaries that protect us. The truth is, you cannot handle the pain of your choice; much like human kind could not handle the pain of Eve’s choice. If God himself had not come to rescue us by dying on the cross & paying for our sin with His own blood, we would all be doomed to death.

You think you know what you want. But God knows what you need. Stop fighting the boundaries & realise that His boundaries give us, his children freedom from Sin, the repercussions on Sin & the pain of those repercussions.



Admittedly, pre-salvation days I used to be a control freak and we know to control anything you must have complete or majority of the power over the choice or thing. Because I had this “I am always right mentality”, which was so disruptive to me truly yielding myself to God and getting to know him, but then at the same time in reality if I must say so myself, I was right about ‘things of this world’ 95% of the time so it allowed me to practice making informed decisions from facts. With this figure it may possibly (most likely) be lower to other people but this is my blog so who cares (*shrugs*) but because I thought with facts combined with logic not based off my emotions I made thoughtful and processed decisions and because of that I am the person I am today.I believe God has the ability not make anything we bring him work in his favour so he has used this characteristic and tweaked it to make it suit his will for my life through teaching me the lesson of what it means to be completely obedient and not partially. See when we’re obedient that means you are following instructions and not making choices about what to do as that is not obedience. We have no choice over anything relating to the instruction, no choice of execution as a good set of instructions will give you details on how to do it, there is no choice of on what type of outcome you will get because you have no power of this decision but you know the one who gave the instruction will never fail you. When you have the power to make choices, you also have the power to mess up as imperfect people and the likelihood of that happening is pretty high regardless of intelligence. God can’t afford for you to mess up your life, it is too important, you are too important to him. God has created his kingdom in such a way that with everyone in it functioning at their maximum potential, that is when it functions the best – so God can’t afford for you to not make choices over his kingdom he knows more about than you will ever.

The illusion of having the power to make choices, irrespective of whether their good or bad choices being made, is destructive and inhibits us from truly getting to know God and his ability/power to do things we can only imagine. The restriction of choice that comes from following God’s laws and instructions through his word and voice is God’s way of protecting us from the temptations and sin of this world which we will pay a price for – but ultimately it all for our own good. God gave us an example of Jesus on how to live as a human which shows the power and blessing of the restriction of choice as Jesus was obedient in everything, even though he had the power to make choices yet never disobeyed his father. Even when he was suffering and asked for the cup to passed (and that it was a real option meaning we wouldn’t be here right now!!) he choose to carry the cup (Luke 22: 42) he knew that to pass it even when he had the power wouldn’t be the right the right choice as he would be choosing disobedience and that was not God’s will. Also, on the cross when he was given the choice by those who were faithless and told him how he saved others and couldn’t save himself, that to come down off the cross (Mark 15: 32) Jesus knew the only choice he had was to obey and God was his only audience. Through the illusion of having several choices, the enemy works by giving us too much choice so that we have more chances to fail as your probability of choosing correctly decreases dramatically. For example, a dice has 6 sides so you now have 1/6 chances of getting the number you want, whereas someone who is informed on what the word of God says and tells you to do in situations only has two options which is a yes to do what God wants or a no to do what the enemy has tempted you with – I know which one I will be choosing every time! We must restrict our choice by knowing the word of God and what the instructions are to learn to say no to the devil and yes to God. We must follow and trust the God we serve can be trusted at all times even in the storms and the times the enemy presents several desirable and some time preferred options, but let your preference be set apart from what the world offers and fixed on honouring and being obedient to God. Restrict your choices from an informed perspective to be able to simply always choose to say no to anything that doesn’t lift God up, and always choosing the only real option which is to say yes to God. Less options = a better choice.

The illustration of Jesus in the bible is so important not only because he teaches how to live a holy life, but he also shows us how powerful being a witness is as we are only Christians today because of his. The devil uses temptation by giving you really desirable choices of how and which way to sin which does not set you apart from this world and ruin witness’ like what he tried to do with Jesus in the wilderness (Matthew 4: 1-11). The devil tempted Jesus 3x but Jesus never gave in even when he knew that what the devil was saying is true, but he was being obedient to what God has instructed him to do which was fast and he used the word of God to combat the devil with  facts of what God has to use his power to cast him away for good. We too have that same ability, when the devil or this world like on social media the amount of choice it falsely gives us on what we should be looking for in partners, we can cast the devil away and fixate our minds on God so we see clearly we only have one choice which is to look for Godly men/women that embody what God says in his laws about what they should be like on the inside and out as it’s your spirits that intertwine, you cant feel or get to kn ow someone spirit through a photo on your 4.7-6 inch phone screen – that is a false choice you think you can make! When we are part of this world and one foot is in the Kingdom of God, we create all these extra options that don’t really exist, to appease the lukewarm lifestyle we are choosing when that option serves the enemy as you are distracting yourself long enough for him to claim you when we bow out of this game called life. Don’t let the enemy fool you, too much illusion of choice gives the enemy unlocked door to walk right on in to, chimneys to climb down and slightly cracked open windows for him to enter our supposed to be God fenced heart being tightly guarded (Proverbs 4: 23). Seek and trust that God will add those things you may desire if it is for you – if it is not die to your flesh and close your eyes my friend!! Let God choose everything in your life, you friends, job and spouse as that is how you’ll get the best out of all of those things!

My relationship with God has gotten so much deeper because I have only given myself the one option which is to be obedient entirely and do what he has called me to do. This is why I am able to come in this space and share my walk because I have limited my ability of making bad decisions by obedience and studying his word in a way that I know how what it says to live by it, I can use it to then wage my war against my fleshly desires and the devil that tempts us and gives choices that are against the law of the word. Yes the law is  holy righteous and good (Romans 7: 12) and it is for your good, but the word itself cannot make you good perfect and holy – those things come from when you limit your choices to one of two being: (1) saying yes to God or (2) saying no and that means you’re against him (Matthew 12: 30) as when you say yes to whatever else is out there you are saying yes to the devil who cares not for you. The price of disobedience is steep and you will beg for it to be the end of the day and then beg for the morning to come in the evening, you will never have peace (Deuteronomy 28: 15 -68) however when you help yourself limit and restrict your choice to one option of obedience to God over everything you also get the peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4: 7) that this world will never be able to give you (John 14: 27). Stand for God like Daniel did (1: 8-16) and allow the will of God to supersede and you will experience breakthroughs like you never could have imagined.

We are not under a law but we are under grace by the blood of Jesus making us worthy (Romans 6:14) which makes the choice to obey easier as we know through grace we are gaining eternity which is priceless. No amount of indulgence in choice and sin could ever be held to the same value as an eternity of perfect peace. Let God and his word choose for you that is how you get God’s best, which will always be better than your own. Always.


Till next time,


P.S – I have a YouTube surprise being revealed on Sunday (depending on when you’re reading this it might already be up lol) so head out and check it out on my YouTube page “MollyMontsz” or my YouTube page on my website under ‘The Tube’ page by clicking here! Hope you love it as much I love recording and hope it helps you to be able to relate to me beyond just my blog posts to show I am no one special, just simply trying to be an obedient child of the most high! #THEWALK


Scriptures in order of appearance:

  • 1 Corinthians 15: 33
  • Deuteronomy 10: 13
  • James 1: 17
  • Ecclesiastes 10: 8
  • Genesis 3
  • Luke 22: 42
  • Mark 15: 32
  • Matthew 4: 1-11
  • Proverbs 4: 23
  • Romans 7: 12
  • Matthew 12: 30
  • Deuteronomy 28: 15 -68
  • Philippians 4: 7
  • John 14: 27
  • Daniel 1: 8-16
  • Romans 6: 14

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When God makes you accountable – use it!

As we all know, God does everything intentionally in our lives for our own good (Jeremiah 29:11), so when God places you in a position in life that he needs you to be in, he will create checks and balances that allow you to stick to this path so to not fall out of this position. Once you surrender your heart on to God you become accountable to him as he becomes the only audience you wish to entertain, but in that the physical element of accountability God will provide also. He uses mentors, counsellors & family etc and he also uses all the things he has given you to work for his glory so he can make you accountable to his standard and a witness to others in your job, in your friendship groups and in situations that you put yourself in but he turns around for your glory.

No one ever said it was easy being a Christian, I personally believe it is one of the most difficult yet rewarding things you can ever do for yourself. You learn to discipline yourself for the good of yourself and for other people. You learn to love yourself properly and then reciprocate that love to people deserving or not, turn your left cheek when someone slaps you on the right, you forgive unconditionally and freely anyone who wrongs you, you are slow to get angry and slow to speak and in that fighting your flesh on a daily basis to not allow it to overcome and destroy you – this is hard and especially in a world where majority of people do what they want because of the desires of their flesh when you choose to walk in spirit! That is why God helps you, help yourself and uses the things around you establish and set yourself apart. When you turn the other cheek in situations like fighting, getting angry when you have a legit reason, not swearing or not rising to the works of the enemy people take notice that you are different. Being different is being set apart from the crowd, that is what God uses to save souls because people are intrigued and fascinated by different. They wanna know why you didn’t get angry and respond to the racist remarks the man in the street was shouting at you, why you didn’t start screaming & shouting when someone is in your face doing the same, why you didn’t fight back when someone laid their hands on you – people are intrigued about your peace and let them be! as it gives God the opportunity to step up and step right in!

In my life, God began to make me accountable in so many different ways (even through social media) before I had even realised what he was doing in my life which this made it very difficult (thankfully) for me to step out on God and not get called out by those who he used or for me to not suffer some sort of consequence in the physical if I did. Recently the devil has been trying to play me and attempt to ruin my witness before I have even begun. I am so thankful that God has given me the chance to share this with you all to help you avoid situations and I’m also thankful that he has given me a heart of discernment to address situations that the devil disguises as distractions (read my distractions: what they look like and what they don’t) and not fall for them. He has given my spirit the self-consciousness to make the right decision in line with who he is and I wouldn’t want to live any other way.

Although I have 3 older siblings, which has given me plenty of practice if need be, my mother always taught us not to fight unless someone hits you first, so I have never been much of a physical fighter as no one hits me. I came to realise recently that no one hits me because 1) I intentionally do not put myself in environments or situations that would call for that sorta thing to happen 2) If I ever happened to be in one, God has given me the gift of being able to talk and even with that to talk sense. He has given me the gift of the power of my tongue coupled with self-awareness to of course use it for his glory, so I make extra effort not to use it for evil, but I am very aware I am able to throw punches through my words of sense and not slander, oppose to punches to with my fist and to be honest the only punches I wanna be throwing are in prayer. Also, I am naturally a slow to anger type of person, although I can get frustrated and irritated quickly, angry is not a word that I would use to describe many situations I have been in or have been faced with – until recently. The devil tries to introduce unfamiliarity into our lives to sidetrack you. As we generally only prepare for what we can anticipate, (usually we prepare to win the fight against the enemy regarding the sins we personally know we commit and are victims to) and we only tend to armour up in those areas, but the devil uses that human weakness of only being focused on what you can understand or know against us. This is another reason why we must stay invested and meditated in the word to be able to have the ability and wisdom to fight and tackle all situations and sins even the unfamiliar sins to us so that we are making our sanctuary air tight and there is no door for the devil to enter in.

I’ve realised why the enemy uses “anger” to do his dirty work as it literally pushes everything in you to get mind touched real quick and to lash out and the replicate what you’re feeling inside your body outside your body in the physical. In those feeling of anger, it clouds your judgement momentarily and allows you to have the necessary space for anger to fill your mind completely and for you to do things you know better than to do. The devil only works his hardest to take someone down when they are doing Godly activities that are building the kingdom of God, so I am flattered to be honest that he has been trying so many different ways to make me fall, so should you be, but it actually lets us know we are right on track and it pushes me to be motivated by this to keep going as something is working. It also gives me the opportunity to assess what areas the enemy likes to pop up in my life so I can look for the trend to cut it out of my life completely. God has allowed me through the eyes of my spirit to walk and be attentive enough of my surroundings to assess the product of what it produces (a good tree will never produce bad fruit – Matthew 7:18) this gives me the power over my life to stop giving the devil the space to try creep in. I need to make my sanctuary, my temple air tight, we need our Kingdom air tight. We need to start leaving no room or space in any area of our lives for the enemy to do pop up visits as it’s not even worth the energy spent on casting him out when he shouldn’t have even been there in the first place.

Our bodies are temples of God (1 Corinthians 16:19-20) so why would I want the place where God dwells, a sacred place to be defiled?! No, no thank you. I respect the sanctity of God in my life and want to keep it. I am accountable to him also so I will not use my bodily vessel for evil or to aid it if I can avoid it?  This is exactly what the devil is trying to get you to do with sin it could be sexual immorality, dishonouring parents, lying but more specifically in this circumstance anger. The devil has been trying to get me angry and use unfamiliar emotions to me that I don’t even want to get familiar with to have to get it under control and using it to derail me. He’s been using angry people to introduce fleshly emotions that are paired with fleshly retaliation of anger me and I’ve sussed him out. I went out for a friends celebration and was placed in a position that I could have been involved in a physical altercation, which is mad to me because if I haven’t been a fighter in my younger years, I sure as hell ain’t gonna start fighting now – it is blatantly the devil. So we were in a tight & tense spot and long story short in the midst of tempers rising the person who was a complete stranger to me claimed to have known me and I asked “Who are you?!” – now this may not seem like a crazy question to ask but as I walk in spirit and believe you have to ask direct questions to get direct answers, I knew I was going to get a truthful response to what I had asked and word for word the person responded “Don’t worry, it’s the devil”. Again, to some this may seem as something someone might say during a heated argument to call out the devil on what he is doing, but if this person had true knowledge and wisdom of God “to be slow to speak and slow to anger” (James 1: 19) and they really understood why it’s important to be “quick to listen” (listen quickly to what your spirit is instructing you to do, not your flesh) then they would not have ever have acted like they were acting as “By their fruit you will recognise them” (Matthew 7: 16). I was mindblown.


That response was literally my spirit calling out to whoever was here to show themselves and the devil literally announced himself and said don’t worry this is what I do, the person even went on to say “You asked about me now I’m here”. Again, for some this may be a natural thing to say (and if it is Jesus is waiting for you to pick up the phone and call him pronto lol) but I was mindblown. Mindblown at the confidence of the devil, I was literally witnessing him use the vessel of this body in their momentary lapse of judgement because of the sin of what anger can do, (getting mind touched allows a space for disobedience to occur by the way) where he has filled that space in their minds to speak directly to what my spirit asked and was not afraid as there was law enforcement all around us – is that not crazy?!!? The devil wanted to scatter God’s sheep (John 10: 12-13 ) he doesn’t care about the person in that moment, he just wanted to use them and would of left the person at the wayside when the police carted her off just because of a small fire, something so trivial that has now caused a forest fire (James 3:5). God on the other hand cares too much to let us be abandoned in our time of need and I felt God more because of my moment of clarity. I don’t take things like this as chance or coincidence or by accident as I know God is very intentional with everything so it left me with only one option which was to walk away. Do you know how hard but yet how immensely satisfying it was to know and feel the victory that my spirit had won in this battle between my spirit and my flesh also one that no one else could see? I was the victor. I stayed obedient. I wasn’t about to not take heed of this warning to fall for his tricks although I was angry momentarily, God favoured me to even awake and write this in the morning (Psalm 30:5). I was obedient to my spirit even though I knew I could have gotten in to it, but because I also knew I have way too much to loose when you step out of your spiritual obedience.

You may have gotten it by now, but I am sharing this with you all because we must start calling things as you see it as there is power and more specially fire in your tongue (as James 3 illustrates the power being fire) for you to use your light to bring what is in the darkness out. Jesus stated the signs that accompany those who follow him will be able to cast out demons (Mark 16: 17) meaning God has given us the ability to square up with the enemy (not the physical person) and win. This coupled with the obedience, you are able to use your accountability to God and your wisdom from the knowledge of his word to respond appropriately. You think with little red riding hood’s knowledge and previous experiences of visiting her grandma that she couldn’t see that the wolf wasn’t her grandma even though he was disguised as her?! That is why she started to speak and ask questions as she was calling it as she saw it with the power of her tongue which she knew was more than her physical strength! We need to learn restraint and the power we have when we do and then act. The story of the demon possessed slave girl in Acts 16: 16-18, Paul was angry with her but also waited before he spoke to the demon to leave. We are human and feelings of anger will come but he used this feeling to act accordingly and not succumb to the flesh emotions and allowed spirit to win as he remained obedient to God.  He used his ability to discern situations to distinguish whether this was of God or not from his knowledge and experience of walking this earth and now knowing that salvation is the only way forward to make the right call. I believe God has brought us up in this generation’s wild lifestyle (which I used to have a front row seat for) not for no reason but to learn to do the same as Paul as God needs well equipped (people who know him and his word) experienced soldiers. He needs us to be equipped with the same knowledge and ability that Paul had to restrain himself and wait so we can use our spirit’s wisdom and experience of this world’s lifestyles to discern when the devil is at play and win this war between the spirit and our flesh (Romans 8). Anger is such a fleshly stronghold of the devil that he has used to consume a lot of people. As your judgement of how to deal with situations is clouded by this flesh consuming emotion, you don’t allow God to fill your mind with the correct emotions and instructions. We must start to use our knowledge wisely of the Kingdom of God and earth and use it to focus on what to teach this lost and faithless generation to share with them how to overcome strongholds of the enemy to save souls with love and freedom.

I can’t get into altercations because God is my only audience and I am called to love not fight in his presence. He has used my chosen career of Law down to my current role to make me accountable as I can’t get into trouble or I’d jeopardise my whole career and loose the job God has place me in which I am beyond happy in. He has made me accountable by his word because I have meditated on his word to the extent scriptures without quoting it have become the bread and butter to the sentences I form. It instructs me to do what God has called me to do in situations of rebuking the devil and that it has become my block and wall of allowing anger to consume me. I am called to be a witness publicly and do the things that set me apart publicly, which makes me accountable to do God in every situation I do publicly. These things are hard at first (trust meeee, I know!) as it can sometimes mean taking the biggest L which will work in your favour as you are not stepping out of your spiritual obedience and that is the most important thing oppose to a 30 second demolition of everything you have taken 10 years to build up – it’s not worth losing it when you have so much to loose.

I know it may seem hard and unimaginable but that’s because that’s what the devil wants you to believe that anger or whatever sin that consumes you and you’re grappling with is something you can’t overcome but I am here to tell you that you can! Use the armour of God (scripture) to wage this war and pray when you feel you are unable as we can’t forget God in the time we need him the most. Use the accountability you have established with him, with the people & things he has placed in your life to be accountable to, use the limitations of a job/career or hobby where you have to practice discipline to be for your good in all areas of your life not just isolating it to the time spent doing these things.

Moral of the story, when God makes you accountable he has done it for a reason which is for your good – don’t waste that gift and see it as a burden, use it for your good like everything else that he has done and made happen in your life! Seize the opportunity to become better!

Till next time,



Scriptures in order of appearance:

  • Jeremiah 29:11
  • Matthew 7:18
  • 1 Corinthians 16:19-20
  • Matthew 7: 16
  • John 10: 12-13
  • Psalm 30:5
  • James 3
  • Mark 16: 17
  • Acts 16:16-18
  • Romans 8

Distractions: What they look like and what they don’t

As soon as I wake up in the morning, 5-6 times out of 10 I can honestly admit that I am guilty of firstly reaching for my phone to check if anything has happened overnight, more specifically if I need to attend to any urgent news. Almost immediately every single time after I check I say “oh yeah, duh! I need to pray” and proceed to doing so as the second task of my day. This is so flawed because I know God is in control of everything and doesn’t sleep, so why do I think I can control the outcome of a situation I wake up to find out has already happened? It’s a distraction. I have come to realise the thing I keep close to me (my phone) has now distracted me from focusing on the thing that actually lives inside of me, God. Of course as he searches and see’s every part of my heart, he knows there was no real intention of knowingly putting him second especially when I know I am first on his wake up call list, but that’s the thing about man-made distractions they put God on the back burner when our focus and lives should have him at the very forefront in every single way, every single day – thank God for grace eh!!

Two things I take away from this revelation – 1) a sense of guilt with a desire not to feel this again 2) a desire to be stretched to dig deep and build on the ability to still focus through the distractions. See, I know distractions are a very natural part of life because as we know, the devil literally comes to steal, kill and destroy (John 10:10) and that means he will do these three things by any means necessary as he knows if he distracts you for long enough you will die and he will claim you at judgement day. He would have killed your hope to overcome your distraction, stole your focus from the Lord and destroyed your idea of salvation that it is yours to use for where you fall short, so he wins. Well, that ain’t any of our portions so we are going to explore what distractions are by figuring out what we should be focusing on in these “distraction periods ” in our lives. As we know God is intentional and we know there is no way he will allow the devil permission to do something in our lives if it isn’t for our good. God lets the weapons that the enemy forms against us to help pass our tests when we walk with him. We claim our triumphs and build a deeper connection with God that glorify’s him through our witness.

Admittedly I used to be a person that loses focus easily and gets distracted (literally like a child and a balloon at times) but as I have become spiritually more mature in Christ, I have realised I also have the same power to get re-focused just as quickly as I can get distracted. Something we all need to understand is that we all have this same ability to get back on our pre-ordained paths of righteousness, not matter how far gone we think we are because of the gift of salvation – you are more than worthy whatever state you’re in.


Quick note/understanding which I think is important – I believe and look at grace as a very thought out, individual and priceless gift created just for you from God your father who knew you before you were born (Jeremiah 1:5). A priceless gift is one that embodies who you are from every angle and demonstrates how well someone knows what you truly desire, this is exactly what that gift Jesus gave us over 2000+ years ago to use today in 2017. The gift of grace is given to everyone yeah sure, which is why we may at times think it’s something we can use as if its a general type of gift and abuse it in areas everyone strrugles with when that isn’t actually your struggle to use your God given grace for. Your grace is for you and who you are which is different to everyone else. It’s for the moments you feel you can’t come back to him, for the moments you doubt him, for the moments you can’t lift your voice up to him is what grace was created for because he knew you would have these moments before you did and you can’t shock someone who knows you. He gave you a gift that is tailored for exactly who you are, meaning he knows exactly what you’ll get distracted by, what you like, what you focus on and what you simply cannot go through so he will never put you in a situation you can’t come back from.

He uses the specifically tailored gift to fill the gap of where you will fall short, (we’re imperfect, the quicker you accept that, the quciker you can find your way back to him with your gift) but in that falling short God uses it to teach you lessons and practices that will build you and your thinking to give you freedom, to give you a new way of life you will benefit from the most. You become a better and stronger person through Christ. Because of this gift, God will never put you through something you cannot handle EVER (1 Corinthians 10:13) as he knows what you can take, he will stretch you in moments feeling like you can’t come back, but that’s a lie from the devil because God wants you. We know this to be true as for example when someone may say to you “I could never do/act how you have, you are so strong” – that’s because they probably couldn’t as they do not have your personal gift of salvation to cover you with that strength to do whatever it was. God knew you would step out on him before you even did it, but it doesn’t change his mind to see you through the sin you commit (and is why we should feel so silly to feel unworthy to take it to God for him to turn it around as he already knows!) our God is smart, he seizes that opportunity to make it work in his favour, which is in your favour. He will use it to teach you important life-shaping lessons to build you up in those areas he needs you to be strong in and where you just need to walk by faith and not by sight to trust him to just do what he does best – win.

That’s the thing as well, God knows you! I’ve said this a couple times now, but we sometimes box God into this ‘human capability threshold’ in our minds when he is so beyond that – he knows you more than you even know about yourself. The you that you think that no one else knows, he knows that person on such a personal level he’ll shock you when he gives you the revelation! This is why he wants a relationship with you so you can get to know him too so you walk together in your maximum potential. Imagine walking with someone who does the impossible?! Yeah, damn straight that makes you just as powerful. He knows what you can handle and what you can not and therefore will never give you something you cannot handle as the gift of grace that exists is one that even if you fail a test, he’ll still make sure what is yours will be yours. We need to use words like ‘we can’ oppose to we can’t and speak like over the situation we are fighting through, it may not be easy but if you remain focused on God you will see him work in your favour. Don’t let something that should take 3 months, take 6 years because you are so distracted, so unfocused – so disobedient.

At this time in my life God has instructed me with such a mahoosive task, which to be fair I have desired for a long time but I did not expect it to stretch me in this unimaginable way. Literally, it’s gotten to the point people’s natural reactions to what I am saying shows me God has changed me so much to deal with the task and I am just in a different space and mind right now for what he has called me to do. The by-product of this task has been nothing less than incredible and has birthed so many more unexpected blessings in my life (Matthew 6:33) that I am just thankful and in awe of because he just keeps showing me he really does see my heart’s desires and he lets me know this in his actions as well as speech that I can trust him every single time! Because I have been practising standing still with God (Malachi 3:6) and letting this world move around me, oppose to moving with it, I thought momentarily I wasn’t able to get distracted again by the same things as I am a new creature right (2 Corinthians 5: 17)?! So no, no way it’s not possible right to go back to being distracted by the same things, by the same sin?! Wrong! This is exactly where one of the benefits of my individual and specific gift of salvation came into play from the father who knows me.

I had built up so much spiritual strength during this task to fight in the spiritual realm battle which I know God had won, but what threw me is that I had forgotten that if something moves in the spiritual, it will also most assuredly have to move in the physical. Faith the size of mustard seed is the spiritual win, the physical win is the mountain actaully moving (Matthew 17:20) which I didn’t anticipate how quickly God was gonna bring the physical act around! So because I hadn’t prepared for this although God knew I had the ability to do it, but naturally the enemy used my weakness of distractions to make a debut. It’s not a nice feeling of being used unknowingly and is why I personally dislike sin as it gets your hands and your distracted thinking to do the dirty work and go against something good happening in your life by someone you renounce – that is so messed up! But it motivates me to try to never let it happen again. It was frustrating as please believe I was focused on God’s word and what it said about this task during this test, however I wasn’t using my spirit to its full capacity and should have used all 5 sense to discern what God was trying to communicate with me through the feelings I was having. This is when I realised the enemy uses distractions that don’t even look like distractions but God has given us an ability to figure him out. So sorry Satan, not today my ninja!

My spirit felt at such an unease and I felt unfocused during this time even though I was focusing on God, but I believe not on what he was asking me to focus on which is how religious practices can sometimes become a distraction. I tried to write, but as I write in spirit, I couldn’t focus. I tried to pray to hear a response, God was silent. I tried to seek God through his word, nope nothing. Then later on as I was persistent with figuring out what this feeling was God finally gave me my revelation through someone else in the body of christ in Hosea 7: 8-10:

“Ephraim, he hath mixed himself among the people; Ephraim is a cake not turned. Strangers have devoured his strength, and he knoweth it not: yet, grey hairs are here and there upon him, yet he knoweth not. And the pride of Israel testifieth to his face: and they do not return to the Lord their God, nor seek him for all this.”

God checked me so quick with this scripture, I could have literally screamed in disappointment at myself as he was speaking to me. I had let man-made things consume my strength and take the focus of what God was trying to do. I had been given the spiritual strength which was getting chipped at by aliens to God (things that are not of God or have no meaning to him), and let it distract me from recognising that this had even happened – I had not recognised the few grey hairs that I had got in completing this test and they didn’t even bring people back to God! Double fail! God used this scripture to help me fall back in line as he doesn’t leave us on the way-side, he helps us get back up and he wants you to know that. I refuse to be a cake not fully baked. I refuse to be the destroyer of my own perfect destiny because I hadn’t learned to tackle distractions that look like them and don’t. I refuse to remain mixed among things of this world when I live for Jesus and I am truly set apart from this world. I accept I will look different when I do things and that’s fine as I wouldn’t be distracted by the things I’ve become so acustom to in this world when I was of it. Man made distractions can be absolutely anything technology, romantic and friendly relationships we’ve put ourselves in oppose to letting God put us in, religious practices that we do as tradition or repetition without it actually doing what it was created for which is to build on your relationship with God, the devil is here to kill steal and destroy and he disguises what you may desire as within your reach and allows you to get so distracted from what the word says you shouldn’t be doing.

God highlights in this scripture that distractions will come, grey hairs will come but do you perceive them? The type of distractions I am talking about are ultimately ones that keep from getting to know God in his entirety and the ones that keep you from worshipping him the way he needs you to -which is with a truly willing and conscious heart where God is kept (Psalm 119:34).

When God gave me this scripture, even after this first revelation, I knew there was still something else that was giving me unrest, something to do with the overall picture of my life as if I was being disobedient (which is what I am most fearful of) so I kept going as I still couldn’t focus. What was going on!? So I continued to meditate on the scripture (Joshua 1:8) as God won’t take it away until he was finished with the lesson. It made me feel so uncomfortable during this whole test but I didn’t know what it was until God cleared the room (my life) and gave me the space to just focus on him and then he revealed it to me that I failed that physical test. Eeesh. Kinda the feeling like when your teacher asks you to stay behind after failing a test and it’s just you two alone and this particuarly for me was a blow as I thought I was doing so well!! Then I heard God say “But you can do better” and literally spoke to me and told me exactly what I needed to work on. Almost immediately I felt the unfocus or block of God’s flow into my life lifted and then gave me the opportunity to re-take the same test – we thank Jesus because I serve a merciful God who can be trusted to bring his promises to pass if he says it (plus, I hate failing, never have and weren’t planning on starting now!). He gave me a space to grow through what I had been through before I make the same mistake. I know Job had to go through some deep tests and ultimately he was honoured by God at the end so this did not dishearten me at all, I actually believe in the saying “If it is raining and you do not feel it, you should be worried” because God is always trying to better you somehow but you need to be in a place with him to perceive it.

God has given us the spirit of discernment as a physical weapon to walk in our spiritual freedom and victory which doesn’t always have to be a speakerphone announcement from God saying yes or no, sometimes you will feel him guiding you. Discernment will enhance your ability to determine what he wants us to do in situations, and for this to truly work in our favour we have to be so in tune without spirits that we feel him so we are then able to open up our inner ears to hear him and obey. Trust your feelings and seek God to figure them out as God can’t give you the next set of instructions if you can’t do the first step properly.

Over the last year, I have begun to be thankful as God is intentional with everything, for the sense of guilt, uncomfortableness, unrest – whatever you wanna call it as I’ve come to realise it comes because I am self-aware and I am walking in my spirit’s direction for my life. I know what I should be doing vs where I am at which can be two very different things, but it that it also tells me I am self-aware that I am being distracted and to do something about it. I know this is where grace steps in when we fall short, but the key question I wish to explore and challenge you with today is that: Are you aware of when you are being distracted and once you are aware what are you doing about it?

I leave you with the below four areas I believe is a start that if you meditate on them and think about them in your life to really challenge yourself to become aware of what is going on in your life in these areas, you will have a lot to take back to God in prayer to help you overcome and break free of these things so you are able to help yourself walk distraction free and the focus on God is intensified:

  1. Distractions of religious practices just becoming a routine – Yes of course if you are doing these things God can use this time to speak to you, but are you in the state of mind of focus to hear him and follow his instructions and law? Fasting just because it’s Friday or has God instructed you to do that so he can give you another set of instructions that will help what he has called you to fast about? Going to a church every Sunday but you’re not learning anything and your spirit isn’t being fed? Religious practices are designed to build on a relationship with God there are a long list of examples for this one but essentially when it becomes a tick box exercise you have become distracted from the purpose of the practice.
  2. Relationships distractions – Family, friends, romantic relations etc Romantic ones are the biggest distraction I’d say of this era and generation. They consume so much of you willingly meaning you have no “real” boundaries of what to accept and reject if God isn’t your focus in it. Ladies, remember your husband is supposed to “sanctify and wash you with the water of the word” (Ephesians 5:26) not you wash him and leaving you still unclean or unfilled – he is supposed to honour you spiritually and physically – You are the neck for a reason in your marriage, not the head. So do not think you can carry a man via your prayers and your passion for Christ, HE is supposed to do that for you. For the men, a husband is also supposed to find (meaning using your Godly heart & eyes to seek and find her) a good thing in a wife and obtain favour from the lord (Proverbs 18:22)  – is she adding to your life? Can you feel the favour of God in your life? Is she the embodiment of a submissive woman to God at all times (which would mean to her husband once you’re married as your focus’ change your earthly duties – 1 Corinthians 7: 32:33) and is she after God’s own heart as the bible depicts, is she or actively working with vigour towards being a Proverbs 31 woman? If  not, ladies and gents do not be unequally yoked (2 Corinthians 6:14) as they are distracting you from waiting for God’s best who will be your help mate in life to take you to heights you can’t even imagine, just like the gift of salvation in your life was handpicked for you specifically they will be too.
  3. Welcomed distractions – TV shows, books, music, outings, hobbies, etc that take the focus off God and fill your mind & create a desire for things of this world and make you groan for these things to God when God wants you naked in front of him (2 Corinthians 5: 1-4) not clothed with these things of the world covering you from his view!! Fix, think and fill your mind on things and of God (Philippians 4: 8)
  4. Unwelcomed distractions – things that catch you off guard or you do not necessarily anticipate but you just roll with it and it does not help you focus your eyes on God ie a new job or promotion that God hasn’t told you to take but it’s more money/better opportunities in your eyes? Or throwing yourself a full blown (and sometimes extended) pity party when something unexpectedly bad/negative happens in your life. Letting negative emotions consume you when you should focused on what God is trying to pull out of you or get you to do in this time?

The key to breaking away from these things is discipline. We need to practice obedience to God’s word to recognise when we are not following it to not allow the enemy a route into your life via distractions or anything else. I will be doing a ‘Obedience: Practice makes perfect’ post which is specifically on obedience but I do speak about it in the majority of my posts – which shows it’s the key to everything.


Till next time,


Scriptures in order of appearance:

  • John 10:10
  • Jeremiah 1:5
  • 1 Corinthians 10:13
  • Matthew 6:33
  • Malachi 3:6
  • 2 Corinthians 5: 17
  • Hosea 7: 8-10 – Key scripture for post
  • Psalm 119:34
  • Joshua 1:8
  • Ephesians 5:26
  • Proverbs 18:22
  • 1 Corinthians 7: 32:33
  • Proverbs 31
  • 2 Corinthians 6:14
  • 2 Corinthians 5: 1-4
  • Philippians 4: 8

Grace & thanks: 5 ways to make a outing an adventure

Come rain or shine, I have always been a person that no matter where I go I always have a good time – I will be that girl laughing or will be making someone laugh when the room is silent. I can be at a wedding or at a funeral and will still feel like that ‘outing’ has added to my life. I have come to realise this is partly because I am very aware of my thoughts and surroundings and understand how it plays a part in my enjoyment or how it may add or take away from my situation – so subsequently, I am always able to be in a constant state of thankfulness. I was having a light-hearted conversation with friends and suddenly my self-aware mode kicked in and felt like I was all of a sudden a fly on the wall. I was watching two people intentionally interact with one another, reach into their word bank in their minds, which has developed through continuous social interaction if at school, at home, with friends or at work. They were able to piece together these words by a formation of letters and make (what may seem to us) legible sentences for the other to do the same thing and respond just as effectively –  I just found myself in dumbstruck awe moment at how awesome God is and was just thinking how fascinating is this!? “Isn’t it crazy we speak a language, a formation of words to make sentences, that we can actually understand each other with?” they both just looked at me, we laughed  as it was so unrelated to what we were discussing and they called me crazy (and some other exchange of words lol) and with no surprise our original conversation resumed and we moved on.

I realised in that brief but significant ‘fly on the wall’ moment we actually take so much in life for granted. The most basic of thing of breathing, to opening up our mouths to speak, to the ability to communicate what our feelings are in our minds and hearts and to even to live in a country that allows the freedom to express these things are all God-given blessings each day of ur lives. When we are of the world and focus on what the “world” deems as “blessings” we limit our ability to have a heart that is truly full to the brim of thanks for everything as we start practising missing the ‘small’ blessings and in that begin to practice ungratefulness – this is where the issue but also the solution lies as all the issues we have in life flow from the heart (Proverbs 4: 23) so we must learn to guard it from ungratefulness which has the ability to flip a simple outing into an adventure.

See the thing about life is that we live our lives based on what is in our hearts and what it desires. Our heart is the only thing God asks for as it is the place he works best. When we are nice to someone they may say “aww you’ve got such a big heart” or when you aren’t too nice to someone they may assume that those issues also come from the state an ‘ugly’ heart which is in fact true as Proverbs 27: 19 says “As water reflects a man’s face, so does his heart reflect who he is” and as God lives in our hearts so it should reflect him in every way, as should our desires and actions in our walk in this world. With a heart that God dwells in, that person knows and understands that nothing would move in their life if God wasn’t in there, and from the place of that very same understanding, is where our thanks to God should come from – our hearts. Once we start living in this truth and constant praise we should have to offer up to God, we will see a shift in our lives and we will feel a change. We need to challenge ourselves and ask “Do I think everything that happens in my life is by chance or at my own hands?” because let me tell me something, it is not. God does it all and the truth of the matter is you could not have opened your eyes this morning or made a single dime in this world without God’s say so – Ask yourself who is god in your mind, God or yourself and the things that have been made in to idols in this world ie money, education, power? We need to start magnifying God in our eyes and start seeing him for who he truly is which is sovereign and give a thanks back to him that is equal (which we couldn’t even begin to even match with the offering of our lives as living sacrifices but it is something) and it starts with having a heart full of thanks. We need to destroy the level of comfortabilty we adopt whilst living in this world and in its truths that are false which is that we are the orchestraters of our circumstances. We cannot create a good or bad situation in our lives without God’s approval – even the times the enemy starts playing up in our lives, the devil must get permission to do anything (Job 1: 6). Do you know how thankful I am that the enemy can’t run free willy nilly all over this earth without restraint and disrupt God’s will for me? I am thankful! I have taught myself how to be grateful in everything (1 Thessalonians 5: 8) and then for everything that follows subsequently because we know the enemy walks this earth and has been for years so it knows well well how to derail us (Job 1: 7) and without grace given by the love God has for us, I would not be able to expect another blessing to follow.

We need to start wanting to know and teaching ourselves what grace actually is to then actively start living this out. We need to re-understand the grace that exists for us to still even be alive. We need to start being thankful in all situations that happen, from when we wake up till when we close our eyes to sleep each day (and even those two things!) because of the true understanding we have of grace. All we do, have and experience in life is for our benefit and as with a true understanding of grace this allows thanksgiving to overflow for the glory of God (2 Corinthians 4:15) and this will be evidenced in your witness, even by your beaming smile you have in a boring outing because you are grateful to even have a chance to be there when so many others don’t make it. None of us should not be living a life of entitlement as we have Christs covering for we know him. How could we possibly live in the fullness of our capabilities that we know we have access to in Christ, if we are entitled children and our hearts are halfheartedly giving him praise when he asked for a full heart? Being able to count your blessings on by one (1 Thessalonians 5: 15) allows us to enjoy every moment as we are living in the fruitfulness of our gratitude to God. You are able to in that ‘outing’ or position you are in life look to your God that you know made it possible and simply say thank you. Immediately you will turn a disappointed heart or any possible feelings of an outing being ‘mediocre’ or ‘ok’ into an adventure as you are seizing your moment. You are acknowledging how blessed you are to be living in the reality of your life which this breaks the barriers and opens the doors in your mind to take the most basic outing and use the desire of your heart to be full of thanks to elevate that moment and flip it into something even better – an adventure.

If we have taught ourselves to take things for granted then we must teach ourselves to be grateful for everything again, even being thankful for the simple finger that is working and you are using to scroll down this page. Our hearts need to be filled with a gratitude like no other as there are blessings you’re not even thinking will be collateral for honouring him when you give him back a heart full of thanks. I lost my oyster card last summer, and I was so distraught as I had cash in it and as I was on the lowest salary I’ve ever been on in my life, so loosing cash was so painful as I’m sure many of you can relate when you’re being so careful with money. My sister often looks at me like I’m mad so I am used to that but she had offered to give me cash when I was in the middle of my tantrum aka mini-breakdown, but this time when she was looking at my stupidity she said “It’s not that deep”. Now we say this a lot to eachother all the time, but almost instantly in that moment it hit me differently. Funny as it is in hindsight, she made me look at myself and in that moment and see all that I had to be grateful for oppose to what I no longer had. I checked myself because I had the power to change my situation. I was all of a sudden started telling God how thankful I am that I’m even alive, that I even could walk back to the station and try find it, that I wasn’t mugged for it, that I even have a sister and one who is even willing to replace it!! The list was endless but ultimately thank you Jesus! If we become so accustom to taking the small little things, to everything in between and then even sometimes the big things in life for granted when God made it happen how then can we truly worship him and reverence with thanks if were not grateful all the time? God has given us a heart of worship towards him to have the ability to give him thanks for everything and in that we learn to apperciate everything. When we worship God we do this “in spirit and truth.” and the truth is he hears us (John 4: 24).

If our mouth are the speakerphone of our hearts and minds, then we need firstly start speaking things in to existence (Mark 11: 22-24) and secondly start living in your confessed truth that God has also seen in your heart and mind (Jeremiah 17: 10) to worship him in full. We should be desiring to worship God in everything and everyday with a heart full of thanks and gratitude for absolutely every situation we face ourselves, which is the mindset we need to adopt when turning a simple outing in to an adventure to have a heart full of thanks for the very experience itself and enjoy every second of it as if it is a gift. Two weeks after I had lost my oyster, I had left work early (from my new God-Given job I was so faithful in waiting for- we thank Jesus!) and a boy rides past me on a bike, then turns around and I’m thinking not today Jesus! He asked me, “Did you loose your oyster?” please believe my mouth probably dropped open – I was in disbelief especially in this day and age where we think people aren’t kind. “Yeah, why?” Now, my oyster had a month travelcard on it but it was my expired uni 18+ one that had my photo on it so it wasn’t crazy he recognised me, but what was crazy is that our paths met again when I was not on my normal hometime schedule for when he even found the oyster. I said no worries about it because I had given thanks to God in that situation, got a new oyster and been already blessed abundantly during this time so I had no care for it or the money (crazy right after my meltdown ha!) he said no and the gave me more cash than I originally had in my oyster card wallet. Can you see God!? Trust me when I say grace and thanks combined do wonders. Give thanks in everything as God hears you and he will honour you – believe me!


Okay so we all know life isn’t always this pleasant to us and we may find ourselves in dry, crustation filled ‘outings’ or circumstances that we have put ourselves in but even in that the bible says give thanks in all things, not for all things (1 Thessalonians 5: 18) As I understand and use what I possess from 2 Timothy 1: 7, I am always able to give thanks because of the love he has given me to glorify him, it gives me the power to overcome any negative or mediocre feelings I have about things and a sound mind in him to enjoy the power I have to appreciate everything in life as he has given it to me! Therefore we have the ability to turn what may just be an outing into an adventure by living in a presence of gratitude always.


I had to challenge myself to think of what tools I am thankful for that help turn a circumstance around which lead to my 5 key principles I consider or ask myself:

  1. Expectation vs Reality: What are your expectations and what is the actual reality- are you separating the two? Are you expecting red carpet royal treatment from a restaurant that is down a back alley in the heart of the hood? In going out, I am conscious of the fact any expectations I have can not be real and can make a bad situation worse, so I don’t create any to not be disappointed once I face the reality of the circumstance. This way I enjoy every part of my true reality as I haven’t gone ahead of myself and assumed things that had every possibility to not be true. If you have expectations which is totally normal, separate it from your reality so one isn’t at the mercy of the other.
  2. Who I am surrounded by: I only tend to go out with people that 1) have a similar mentality to me in regards to the expectation vs reality rule and 2) people I can laugh with. If you don’t possess any of the two I wouldn’t even be able to fully enjoy an outing let alone create an adventure. It is important to be surrounded by similar minded people because peoples thoughts and attitudes are infectious. If your being infected with the right energy, that will hopefully drive the both of you to make the most out of any outing as you simply just enjoy being in each other’s company. It’ll make amazing memories that you would want to remember for a lifetime and look back on them with your friends when you’re 50+ and reminisce.
  3. Money is not the be all and end all: Don’t get caught up into how much you spent to go there and then create expectations off of that. Also don’t let money stop you whilst you’re there. Budgeting is the most effective way to overcome this, cutting your clothes according to your size. If you can’t afford to let any money spent go if it ever came down to it, you shouldn’t be going anywhere. Enjoy with no restraints and seize the moment as if money was never a factor – this world and it’s beauty existed before currencies were ever created, the bible literally illustrates how much adventure is possible!
  4. Perspective is key: Having a positive mindset is key. To be able to give thanks for the outing comes from a positive mind frame, so you can only imagine what a thankful and positive mindset will do in the moment? You’ll be able to turn a bad situation into a beautiful situation irrespective of the reality of it as you are able to see what you can be thankful for.
  5. Tomorrow is never promised: Sadly the only thing in life that has been promised is death. Because we forget this traumatic truth we think we are going to get another shot at enjoying another outing in a different location but the truth is that it is never a guarantee so live and give thanks as if it is your last. God gives us our daily bread (Matthew 6: 11) meaning he gives us everything we need to live a life of fullness, joy and peace every single day if we choose to seize it as tomorrow has worries of its own (Matthew 6: 34). You’ll learn to enjoy every single second of your life as you appreciate what you have which is today and not look forward to something that might not come – isn’t that the only way to live?! YOL.. or something like that!


Hope this helps turn any situation you are faced with around and more so helps you create an adventure out of your life oppose just walking through it as if it’s not capable of so much more – in Jesus name!


Till next time – Carpe diem,



Scriptures in order of appearance:

  • Proverbs 4: 23
  • Proverbs 27: 19
  • Job 1: 6-7
  • 2 Corinthians 4: 15
  • 1 Thessalonians 5: 15
  • John 4: 24
  • Mark 11: 22-24
  • Jeremiah 17: 10
  • 1 Thessalonians 5: 18
  • 2 Timothy 1: 7
  • Matthew 6: 11
  • Matthew 6: 34

“Come follow me” said Jesus – not your pastor.

“Come, follow Me,” Jesus said, “and I will make you fishers of men.” – Matthew 4: 19

In this world when we are of it, we search for the next best thing to make us feel fulfilled and majority of the time we are thirsty for the wrong thing. A thirst that is created for and satisfied by the wrong thing will never be permanently quenched. We need to fix, think and fill our minds on God (Philippians 4:8) to know what we should be drinking to quench that thirst permanently. We need to go ourselves and find ourselves the well that will quench that thirst and satisfy us for eternity is. In John 4: 4-26 (which I highly recommend you read) The story of the Samaritan woman & Jesus made me reflect on whether the drink I desire is the same drink Jesus was offering? Thirsts can be dangerous and addictive especially in this social media-crazed world we live in, it can plant the wrong seeds of what we should be seeking validation from. We created means  of constantly needing the approval from other mere men, and constant approval from worldly standards when we should have our eyes on God who will ultimately judge us, we should understand and embrace that we are set apart (Hebrews 10:10) and salt & lights to this world (Matthew 5: 13-16) and that these type of thirsts (and more) can create ‘people bondage’. This is where you are responsive and carry out acts based on how other people perceive it whether they are right or wrong even when you know your truth. You cannot allow people or things to dictate your life.

In John 4: 9 God gave me a clear revelation that God solely wants a relationship with us and practices and even religious practices are secondary to this important fact. When meditating on this scripture that Jesus asked a Samaritan woman for a drink and in those times Jews and Samaritans did not mix – God has clearly given anyone and everyone clear and direct access to him, nothing is in your path or stopping you from being able to draw from the well of eternal life yourself. It’s a one on one relationship. No middle man required. God is saying it is time for us to break free and step in to our power and confidence that God our father called us to have to do a will he has for us (Matthew 4: 19-20). Sometimes that means we must stop “following and needing” pastors, preachers, ministers, prophets etc to hear the message that God also directly speak to us. We need to find and seek Jesus by ourselves for ourselves and not allow a middle man to stop the relationship God destined us to have with him as that is Gods ultimate desire, for us to have a relationship with him not just to follow his word blindly – he will say depart for he did not know you though you did ‘XYZ’ in his name (Matthew 7: 21-23).

Now, this post isn’t here to tell you to do what I have not said which is to leave your church, disrespect the authority of God in your life and disrespect the men and women God called to preach his message (that is sinful and there is a need for authority to give account to as they watch after your souls Hebrews 13: 17). We must still fellowship as a body of Christ (Hebrews 10: 24-25) and the physical representation and manifestation of a body of Christ working together victoriously usually comes in a form of a church where you are being spiritually fed. So I encourage you to find a good church your spirit is at rest with as it will most definitely help your faith walk because as we know where two or three are gathered.. (Matthew 18:20). However, that’s just it, find a church, a body to fellowship with not a good preacher to follow as church is one day a week. The preacher does not follow you home and around for the next 6 days! We should be seeking him everyday in the same way on Sundays for the same results we feel on that day. This post is to encourage you that you have the power to do what happens on Sundays everyday. Don’t attach the capacity of your faith walk to 1/7th of your week and a human who can fail you (Isaiah 2:22). We need to understand and establish our God-given ability in the tools and power given to us as his children children to push and further our faith ourselves. 

We are all children of God who follow Christ our one true teacher (Matthew 23:8) not organisations, people or blessings. We shouldn’t follow people who speak well or convict us or show signs from God, Jesus warned us against this when crowds will flock to see him as he understood too was a fisherman for his father but he too is the ONLY sign you’re gonna get (Luke 11: 29-32) we go wherever God is and we fellowship to feel him as he’s the one who asked for us to be caught. We fellowship together in church or wherever to help him catch people, we are fishers of men, God is the one we are giving these fish to when we catch them. Preachers are preaching based on this very instruction – they are not speaking, walking and living in their purpose to accrue fish for themselves, they are catching them for our God who sent them! Seek him, follow who they are following – you would be selling yourself short to only like or want to hear from certain preachers and will miss the very same blessings that you see the preachers have as they are simply following the one who gives it as they don’t! The spirit that has been stirred in preachers has been stirred by God’s very hand, the same hand that lays upon us waiting for us for the same! They exists to steer and we have accountability on this earth!

God has blessed so many different men and women to preach his word, so who are we to say because of our lack of spiritual awareness, social construct or possibly based on culture or tradition, who is good or who is not? We should be seeking God himself for a similar type of relationship where they are akin to hearing God. We need to focus on fine tuning his voice to hear see and feel ourselves as well as through the people he has blessed gifts and talents with to bring his flock home, and if you don’t hear him flee (John 10:5). That is what we should be doing to increase our faith, following God through the people he gives to us to help us. We can’t piggy back into heaven off of anyones prayers or preaching. We can’t also judge our faith based on anyone else but we can aspire to have the same faith as a possible benchmark for your goals as you just don’t know if God has called you to surpass those benchmarks. You don’t know if you’re the chosen. Give yourself the real chance to allow God to show you that. This is why we don’t focus on the ‘religion’ or churches or even preachers, but our single focus (Colossians 3:2) is on heaven and God as he will tell us everything we need to know, which we do by building our relationship with him in everything with the tools and talents he gave us. One tool we all possess is that everyone has an inner ear (Isaiah 55: 3) which hears what God is telling you directly and through anyone who is part of his kingdom and also in that you are able to be ready to receive the word and further go seek him in his word to see if the things the preacher says are true (Acts 17:11) the journey just doesn’t stop when you receive the good news, the preachers have just done their part you have yours to do.

The thing is my God is actually wonderful and has strategically planned out our lives, so be vigilant of the seed and messages God is planting all around you as there is purpose in it. You never know when God will start pouring into you the water of eternal life to harvest the seeds for your glory. Bank the seeds, prayers and messages you hear and seek from God and explore them intentionally. God will come back to begin his harvest when his time is right. We don’t need pastors/preachers etc to begin fellowshiping as we have all been given the same grace and confidence to do it together (Matthew 18: 20) and have the ability to come boldly to God thrones (Hebrews 4: 16) in order to complete his work. The leaders help steer us a body of Christ, but just as the functionality of a boat we all know the captain is in charge and is able to steer the ship but is is actually the commander who steers it in the physical and every sailor and crew member has a part to play that they are confident in doing, otherwise that ship ain’t going nowhere. It’s just another title for a job that God has called someone to do. We are all kingdom workers regardless of whether we’re on a pulpit or in a pew, God views us all the same. So why would you be motivated to follow the middle man when you have direct access to God? 

Fellowship isn’t just about just about hearing the word of God but is a group of things, there is blessings in praise and worship, sermons, offering, announcements etc this all creates an environment of fellowship where God is present and allows us to lift him up. You don’t have to actually attend a building/church if you are unable to, but you must be attentive to what God’s instructions are and obey them. Build your relationship with him intentionally which is the most important thing to him and tool to living a life filled with him. Trust where God is leading you as it is him who is the captain, creator and master of this ship we call our lives.

Till next time,


Scriptures in order of appearance:

  • Matthew 4: 19
  • Philippians 4: 8
  • John 4: 4-26
  • Hebrews 10: 10
  • Matthew 5: 13-16
  • John 4: 9
  • Matthew 4: 19-20
  • Matthew 7: 21-23
  • Hebrews 13: 17
  • Hebrews 10: 24-25
  • Matthew 18:20
  • Isaiah 2:22
  • Matthew 23:8
  • Luke 11: 29-32
  • John 10:5
  • Colossians 3:2
  • Acts 17:11
  • Hebrews 4: 16

Huh, does that even make sense?! – Part 3

*click here for part 1 & 2*

So that whole defensive streak got crunked up a notch and let’s just say I’ll leave that story there (haha) but one question that kept repeating itself in my head was ‘Is God first in my life!?’. First in my thoughts even before I think and then even before I speak? Is he first in how I think to act and when I actually act and portray myself to others? First in my decision making and is everything else just a possible consideration after him? This made me feel so inadequate as the apple of his eye who keeps me (Zechariah 2:8) for him not to be mine. This is what I like to call a faith spurt moment. It is a moment in time where you have two roads and only one real option. When God challenges you with a revelation, you have two choices – grow with it and let what he’s doing manifest itself in your life or stay comfortable and continue as normal and lie to myself that it can’t be done. My God is able so I chose the latter. I chose to embrace my faith spurt and increase the faith I had in God and who he is to make him first, so I followed my faith spurt through with an action and went away from my sisters and I’s conversation and prayed till it made sense. Point 6.


6. P.U.S.H – Pray (or push) until something happens, God will deal with the rest – Lamentations 3:25-26

In hoping that we always take the latter in life to grow through our faith spurt, we shall indeed give God the space in our lives to be good to us as we wait on him to follow through on his revelation and do as he promises. Let our souls seek him and push through by if need be singing gospel songs that speak into existence the faith your desiring, dance, reading the bible and Godly books, praying about it, fasting, fellowshipping with Godly counsel for God to use them or just by simply sitting still in front of God till his salvation and mercy blesses us with the fruit of the revelation. Just Push. In my seeking God to make him the apple of my eye, as I had quickly acted in obedience to what he requires us to do which is to just focus on him, he too acted quickly and blessed me with answers to my prayers which increased my faith walk. But not only did he just do that, as our God works in the physical he also instructed me to start writing this three part series as the first post for this website (which at the time was only a seed he planted in my heart, but look how that has grown!) which in this post covers so many foundational basis that you should always be practising in your faith walk. And you think our God is still not intentional in every single thing that happens in our lives? Think again.

God was building my foundation in him and was also building also the foundation of my purpose to reflect him in every way – have you allowed God that space in your life to do the same building? Philippians 4: 6-8 is my go to scripture whenever I feel weary for different things it says, for this moment God stayed true to his word of through supplication and thanks and therefore he dealt with my requests promptly. Are you tired of waiting on God? Have you checked that you are actually walking in spiritual obedience to receive the answers to your prayers? We all have the power to access the promises God has given us but we just must push in whatever way we know how. In doing this if it is God he will provide us with the confidence to execute his instructions without a care in the world as our eyes will be fixated on him in front of us and the audience of the world will be behind you. Imagine that confident feeling of doing things that make you happy when no one else is watching, but now imagine there is an abundant reward by your audience of one for still doing those things in private. Win win I say. On to the next point.

7. God gives real confidence and the power to overcome fear to walk in purpose happily – 2 Timothy 1:7

Your confidence comes from knowing we have a permanent home with the Lord we’re tryna make moves to secure (2 Corinthians 5: 6-8) and that we will never truly be at home in these bodies, so why would we live a life to solely pleasure the temporary? This is where fear kicks in during the wait on this earth for the full and fulfilling life we desire that is only in heaven.

Fear is so crippling and sometimes paralysing in so many different ways I can’t even begin to describe it. Fear can appear outrightly and we are able to identify quickly the feeling or how it presents itself, which to be honest is actually the best type of fear as God has given us the tools, ability and power overcome the things we weren’t born with so you knowing exactly what to tackle to overcome and destroy it is helpful. However, fear can also appear very discretely and sometimes not even as it’s bold itself and that’s the fear that can hold you in a captive place as you are simply unaware of its disguise. It can take up different appearances and may look like comfortability, it can look like a ‘bad choice’ it can even look like ‘it’s just the way life is’ or ‘I was born this way’ but this is categorically not true. God has given you the power (2 Timothy 1:7) to overcome anything that is not of him. The fear to do hard work to achieve this overcoming cripples you into believing that it’s not changeable, as a consequence of our inability at times we stay distracted long enough for the devil to claim us and steal the destiny and  blessings has for us (John 10:10) but this is not our portion in Jesus name because in the word of God he identifies to us what is ours so we must claim it. Fruitfulness, hands that produce a harvest, a Godly marriage with true Godly people, kids, a career – the list goes on! God gives you the confidence through the power he has given us to overcome to claim what is ours! overcome that fear! overcome that sin! Show the world who your Father is! Are you pro-actively claiming what is yours?!

I come and was raised in a Nigerian household where there is a hierarchy complex and even more unfortunately I am the youngest (doubling my portion of overcoming – yay!) but when I stepped into my God-given purpose, I also knew the God who gave it to me was able – that is where my confidence to say the truth of God and be unapologetic about it came from. A saying we were brought up with in my household is that “charity begins at home” and this is so true that anything you start must begin in the place closest to you. I had to overcome in my God-given pre-disposition gain the confidence to go out there and do it in a world where they don’t even know me to love me. The confidence gave me the ability to remind myself if God is first I must do as he commands, my focus and mindset are solely interested in “Am I putting what’s God way first before anything else” nothing else matters as God gives you the confidence to go out and do as he bids, not what the world does. God does not want you to be ashamed of using this authority he has given you (2 Corinthians 10: 7-8) as this authority and confidence builds you up and does not tear you down. Understanding that I might be spiritually more mature than people older gives me the confidence to deliver on Gods way in heaven on earth and overcome what practices we may have adopted in tradition or hierarchy on this earth. God rules end of and that means I must obey him, not this worlds truths. Leading to my next point.. 

8.  Obedience brings blessings. Disobedience brings curses. That is a promise – Deuteronomy 28: 1- 14 (blessings) and curses (15-68)

Grace is of course sufficient when we unintentionally & momentarily step out of God’s covering when we disobey him and we want to run back to him, but as Deuteronomy 28 will explain – you DO NOT want to step out or be out of that covering for long. Being disobedient brings way more curses than blessings (just look at the passage length differences above) and God has promised you in his word this will come to pass just as the blessings will, but the fruit of blessings is much greater as it brings you true happiness in this life, which will consequently bring a harvest which will produce more blessings in our lives and for our generations to come so on so forth. I actually chuckled out loud when I read the curses as God is not playing with us – AT ALL! This is like when you disobey your parents and you know there are consequences that will most likely involve tears (and other forms of physical abuse that are illegal in most countries lol) don’t play yourself chile!

God wants us to obey him and has given us the power in obedience to destroy any obstacle or barriers that come up against the truth of who he that keeps us from knowing him (including the obstacles of our mind and thoughts that cripple us). We then use that understanding of rebellion from him to teach others through our witness how to be obedient. The people who remain to be disobedient after this will be punished (2 Corinthians 10: 5-6) but just make sure we remain blameless and upright in him.

When God speaks to you directly through him and his word or people telling you as his child to obey his instructions for his will to be done, do it and your confidence will increase 10x fold as your eyes aren’t fixated on what this world tells you as this world did not create you – he did. For example, money is man-made, how can you think God wants you just to work for money which is something he did not create and die? Ermm, no. The bible says GIVE and you can only give from what God gave you which is you mind, body and soul – give to others your witness of your life for God and make them rich with wisdom which is far more valuable than a single penny in this world and the next where you ain’t packing your coins to!

You cannot let the false truths, practices and behaviours and even the accepting nature of all types of sin in this world ie vanity, wrath being acceptable, practising being lazy (slothfullness) and being unproductive, sexual immorality, greed etc manifest in your life without conviction. These are all types of weapons of the enemy used and disguised as ‘truths’ to stop us pushing to overcome and walk in the real truth which is the word of God (John 1:1) so we can spiritually slay him and have victory in the eternal life we are truly living and fighting for right now.

The enemy wants to dis-armour us with the false truths of this world, but we must seek God diligently in his word to armour ourselves with the truth to drive out and reject the lies just as light drives out darkness. And although the darkness in this world is plenty and they won’t understand why we shine our light unapologetically (John 1:5) we must still press on as we know this earth is all smokes and mirrors. One day it will end which we are guranteed, and we’ll have to face judgment for the real show – a place in heaven. Are you ready to give that account? We need to be obedient to God’s words and instructions and do not feed the lie we tell ourselves that we cannot overcome or achieve anything that is in God’s word for our lives. Challenge that fear head on and cast it down by physically rebuking and breaking free from the shackles it has had you bound in for so long. Pro-actively shun the sin that has been appeased by this world’s false truths, because just as the same way the worlds ‘truths’ will tell you it’s impossible, and because we are standing with Christ in this we say ‘but with God all things are possible’ (Matthew 19: 26) and speak positivity victory over our circumstances – GOD IS ABLE, that means so are we!

Nothing, absolutely nothing and I can’t stress this enough, is impossible when you stand with God and for God. Nothing. No matter what this world tells you, just face him with faith and prayer (Mark 11: 24). He is able. God does the exceeding and abundant and there is not a situation in this world God is not in control of and cannot turn around for you to glorify him in. This post has been longer than anticipated as what I have written was definitely spoken into me by God for someone reading this, I stand in agreement with you right now that if it is for you that God has done it in your life and you are able and you have overcome. Go and walk into your life of freedom and obey the one who has given it to you. Amen

So to end my story, my sister and I we both went to the Christian event and obeyed our spirits, but don’t let the word ‘Christian’ or an association with christ convict you in going somewhere you are not supposed to be – I was a major culprit of this and have learnt to be still and hear God speak so he orders your footsteps in a way you can delight in them (Psalm 37: 23). Don’t go to events in general that you are not led to go to. Don’t force it. Don’t do it. I know we all have had that moment where when we arrive we say “I know I should of parked my bum down at home”. I honestly believe if you are walking in your spirit, your spirit ain’t gonna lie to you so we should follow that same conviction and listen before we put ourselves in positions we just never needed to be in. 

However if you’re supposed to be there God will make it happen even if the enemy places obstacles that appear to be out of your control to stop you reaching your destination, which he will do in our physical and spiritual walks. But sister, brother don’t allow the devil to use your hands to do his dirty work. Do not allow your non-attendance of a destination that God has called you to be in to be in your control as that is disobedience and is dangerous and unfulfilling territory we are not covered in. 

Key points to take from this in addition to the 8 points are that:

  1. We are all children of God learning in every circumstance how to be better, but we must be open to God doing it in the way he sees fit.
  2. Everything happens for a reason and your good. Embrace it. 
  3. There is a lesson in everything. Activate and listen to your inner ear as God has ordained people for specific reasons – so be attentive at all times.
  4. You are an overcomer. You have overcome. It is done – fear is not your portion
  5. You have all the power within you to grow in Christ if you so wish to, but you must walk in faith and obedience to see the full capacity of the manifestation of your faithfulness.

Thank you for reading this series and pray you have been blessed and this has sparked a fire in you. These understandings, scriptures and principles you should meditate on will set a foundation in Christ that cannot be shaken if you follow them diligently – God has promised you this.

Till next time,


Scriptures in order of appearance:

  • Zechariah 2: 8
  • Lamentations 3: 25-26
  • Philippians 4: 6-8
  • 2 Timothy 1: 7
  • 2 Corinthians 5: 6-8
  • John 10: 10
  • 2 Corinthians 10: 7-8
  • Deuteronomy 28: 1- 14 (blessings) and curses (15-68)
  • 2 Corinthians 10: 5-6
  • John 1: 1-5
  • Matthew 19: 26
  • Mark 11: 24
  • Psalm 37: 23